Wanting More

Angry Tears

"What did you just say?"

I pushed Shayne back slightly feeling very confused and angry. Did he really just say her name? He brought his eyes up to my face and raised his brow. "I said Bobbie." He answered and proceeded to lean back in. "Wait, what did you hear?" He laughed but stopped once he saw my face which had gone from red with anger to red flustered embarrassed cheeks. "What did you think I said?" He asked once again, this time more forcefully with a deep tone.

"No it's fine! Pretend like I never said anything." I hopped off the counter and walked down the hall and into my bedroom. Huffing and rubbing my forehead as I searched my wardrobe for my pyjamas. I pulled out a black tank top and shorts when the sound of slow and heavy footsteps caused me to turn around. Shayne was leaning against the doorframe and rubbing his jaw.

"What happened?" He asked, slapping his hand against his thigh. "And don't tell me 'nothing' because it sure as hell didn't sound like it!" Getting changed I sighed and shyly looked away from him as I spoke meekly. "I thought you said somebody else's name, that's all! I overreacted, sorry."

Looking over to Shayne while I walked towards the bed, I could see him shaking his head slightly and moving his jaw in miniature circles. "Who's name?" He asked. His sounded like annoyed and tired at the same time but part of me suspected he already knew my answer. "Does it matter?" I scoffed trying desperately to avoid the question. "It matters to me! And by the look on your face earlier it matters to you too!" Shayne shouted quietly in a much deeper tone now.

I sat on the bed with my legs crossed, my eyes concentrating on the rain that was streaming down my window causing the city skyline to become blurry like a camera out of focus. I didn't want to look at him, he was already angry at me and so was I. Paranoia and jealousy had begun to creep into me and cloud my judgement. "Courtney." My voice cracked, I could barely get the name out of my throat without sounding like a sad child.

A long deep sigh was heard to the right of me I brought my eyes over to Shayne to see him looking at me with soft blue eyes and a light smile. "We've been over this a thousand times by now! I have no feelings for her! You don't have to be worried anymore." His voice has become a lot softer and gently. He didn't sound tired or pissed, just concerned and genuine.

"I know but it's hard! I'm a nervous wreck every time you leave for work and I can't help but think you're lying to me because every bit I've know has just used me!" I blurted out while a few cold tears ran down my cheeks. I wasn't sobbing but I could feel that stretched feeling in my throat making my voice sound all funny. "Honey, come here!" He tutted lying down on the bed and pulling me into his arms.

"I get nervous too you know?" He chuckled. His eyes were focusing on following his thumb that was rubbing over my hand. "Why?" I asked looking up just in time to see a small smirk creep onto his but quickly disappear. "It's just you and Damien are after getting so close since we all moved in together. And whenever I come into a room the two of you are laughing or messing around, I don't know I guess I'm just worried."

I chuckled "me and Damien? He's crushing way too hard on Boze to even look at me!" Shayne brought his eyes down to me and cock one of his eyebrows. "You must've noticed!" I squealed but he just shook his head. "Wow you really are oblivious!" We both laughed.

"Can you promise me something?" He whispered and I nodded. "If we ever break up," my head jolted up. "I said if! But if we ever break up promise me you'll find someone that makes you laugh and you're happy with." I sat up and leaned in my arm for support. "You make me and happy!" I whispered and leaned in and kissed Shayne's forehead before going under the covers and cuddling up next to him, falling asleep with a smile still in my face.

Courtney POV
I got home and went straight into my room. Kicking off my shoes I threw myself across the bed and buried my head into my pillow and cried. Why did she have to take him away from me? And why didn't he pick me?

All the memories I had of Shayne flooded through my mind.

Few months back...
I finally built up enough courage. I was going to walk, no stride into the office and tell Shayne I love him. He made me feel so happy and I got butterflies whenever I was alone with him. I strode down the hall checking my reflection in the frames of some pictures as I passed. I was wearing a peach lipstick that Shayne had complimented me on a few days before.

I made my way down to the lounge but halted seeing Shayne walk out of the door and down the opposite hall calling out something. I decided to follow him. By time I got down to meet him he had finished some sort of conversation with Bobbie and had begun walking away. "Hey Shayne! Can I talk to you for a moment?" He marched straight past me. "Not now Courtney." He growled. I quickly followed after him, nearly jogging trying to keep up with him.

"I know but it's kinda important and it wouldn't take long so if you could just stop so we could talk." I awkwardly laughed. He stopped. He let out a deep sigh and turned around. His face was red and his eyes were so angry. "I said not now Courtney! God you can be so annoying at times! Just back off a little will you!" He yelled quietly and scoffed before turning in his head and walking away.

I was shocked but strangely not hurt. I knew he was just stressed and I thought I knew why. Bobbie must've said something to him to make him lash out.

Snapping out of my flashback I sat up on the bed and whipped away my tears. She had ruined everything for me since day one I just needed her to leave Shayne alone. She wasn't good enough for him and he deserved someone way better.

I just wanted someone to love me, was that so hard? I had already been hurt so much by her it was time for her to feel the same way. The pain she felt after I kissed Shayne would be nothing compared to elegant I was planning.