58 | He Loves Me Not

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"He doesn't like me,"

Iris doesn't believe my words as she leans back against her chair with a pointed look. I shrug, taking in the complete obvious. I cross my arms, challenging her.

"You're telling me that Julian came to your house when you're bawling out; he comforted you the entire night; and he nearly kissed you does not mean he like you?" Iris scoffs, while I nod my head. "No guy would go to your house for you—when he is practically mad at you—if he doesn't have feelings for you."

"It's just a spur in the moment thing, alright?" I declare, "Julian is a friend, and if you heard a friend crying you would go to them."

"I'm your best friend and I don't know if I would've gone over either." I threw a fork in her direction, before she broke out into a smile. "I'm kidding, I would but—"

"Exactly." I confirm simply. "Plus, after we almost kissed, he apologised profusely and said that's not what he meant to do. Tell me that screams I like you!"

"You asked for a fresh start, what else you expect?!" She nearly screams, frustrated with my lack of acknowledgement that Julian likes me. He doesn't. "He doesn't want to go against your wishes? He respects your boundaries! He likes you!"

"But if he likes me, why wouldn't he tell me?"

"Francena," Iris sighs, "he did! You're being a complete Graham today—"

"Hey!"

"—and I love you, but you're completely obvious when it comes to someone liking you. You can see it when other people like each other, but why can't you see it yourself? Julian likes you, and since you asked for that stupid fresh start, he thinks either a, you don't like him, or b, you don't a relationship with him and only want a friendship."

I lean back against the chair, saying nothing. I wanted to argue that when someone likes you, you're completely oblivious to the fact because you question everything. You overthink it. Especially me. It seems stupid, completely out of this world, that someone — especially someone you have liked before and was considered out of your league — likes you back. I couldn't say it back, because Iris would cleverly come up with a rebuttal.

"Look," I begin, making eye contact with the Iris' big brown ones. "I fucked up twice. I was Miss Incomplete, the girl that sends him creepy love letters. And I fucked up when I went to him and pointedly told him that I thought he would sell me out. Even if he did told me he likes me—and shut up, don't bring that up—he would've lost those feelings by now. How would you feel with all these new information coming in about the person you like? Wouldn't, I don't know, you find it too much and just stop?"

"Okay, maybe," Iris agrees, and I give her a widened eye look. "But! I'm not Julian, I don't know what he's thinking and god knows what it is. What I know is, that boy has done countless things you've hated and you've done some things he hated. Your relationship with him is not perfect, but it's something. Francena, I've never seen you like this before. And yeah, maybe it's because you finally picked up a crush again after a long time of being single but hey... have you ever thought that maybe, maybe he could be the one that makes you happy?"

I quiet down. Not knowing what to reply to that.

"Rose," Graham sends a look over to Iris, "yeah, maybe he could make her happy. But Rose, there's so many shit that's happened with their relationship. Erin, twice! Miss Incomplete and the whole True Friend thing. A relationship is supposed to have problems, because that's how things work sometimes, but don't you think too much problems mean something?"

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