Chapter 90

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I forced Elijah to sleep in his room because I didn't want him to see his father and I fighting. I left the door open because I was ready for Benjamin. I sat on the couch waiting for him and thinking about everything.

What do I say to him when he comes? Do I confront him or what? There's so many questions I have for him but I don't know how to ask him because I'm scared of the answers. What if he is cheating on me - than what? How will I cope with two children when I don't even have a job. I can't ask my sisters or Anna to help and I definitely can't ask Charlotte because she's going to tell Benjamin about me suffering.

"Jay told me he was lying." I quickly snapped out of my thoughts and looked where the voice was coming from. "I'm sorry." Benjamin was standing on my left and he looked sad.

"For what?" I shouted getting up. "For cheating one me?" I didn't even know I had so much hate for him as soon as I saw him. I do love him, a lot but somehow I always seem to be the one getting hurt.

"No, I didn't mean---"

"You didn't mean to cheat on me." I shouted interrupting. "Benjamin you said you loved me."

"I didn't cheat on you Sofia. I'm married okay so being with my wife doesn't mean I'm cheating on you." I couldn't help my tears, the way he said it just made it more painful. He made me believe for months he wanted to be with me - that I was the only women he needs. He confessed his love for me a million times. He even promised to always be with me.

"You were with Carlene." I shut my eyes waiting for an impossible answer.

"Yes." He didn't even take a second to reply.

"You sick." I shouted. "I should've known your sweet words and everything was to get me in bed. I shouldn't have believed you, I should've never got pregnant by you again. I wish I never met you Benjamin."

"Will you just stop crying." Carlene said coming in like the spoil brat she is. "Benjamin can you hurry. I have a flight to catch."

"I'll be there, wait for me in the car." He replied acting like I was invisible.

"Don't let me get bored babe." She quickly winked at me. "Sofia can I quickly say goodbye to Eli---."

"No." I said firmly. There's no way his wife or him will come near my son ever again.

"Carlene, don't make me angry and wait in the car. I'll make sure I hurry because our flight isn't till another hou---"

"No problem love. Bye girl." She quickly left in a hurry.

"You guys make an awesome couple." I looked up trying to keep my tears in.

"Thank you." He said smiling. "How's the baby and Elijah?"

"Ask your wife." I didn't care if I sounded jealous. "You a cheater and a liar Benjamin and I'm happy I found out about it now, at least I'm not blinded by love anymore."

"I'm really sorry. I wish---"

"Why were you in a hurry to get me pregnant when you knew you were going to leave me and my child." I asked in a hurry.

"I never thought I would leave you." He started. "I thought I loved you, I really did but there was no spark between us anymore. Sofia I thought getting you pregnant would get me to care and love you again but it didn't work. When I'm with you it feels like I can't breath anymore. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you." There was no way I would show him how hurtful his words were so I just nod my head as if I understand him.

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