In Time

Chapter 42

Kevin then understood why some people said that solving coding is much more easier than solving women's thoughts. He knocked on the door, but received no reply. He turned the knob and pushed the door. He found no one.

Where is she? He asked silently.

He then heard a faint sobbing sound behind the door. He pulled the door and there he found the girl that he doted was sitting and curling into a ball, her hair was draped all over her. Looking at the scene, he felt like someone squeezing his heart.

He immediately knelt down and hugged her. He didn't know how to console her as he never consoled anyone before. "I'm sorry." That was the only sentence that he could think of though he didn't know what his fault was. However, he knew it well that making her cry was his biggest fault.

"Why? Why did you check on me?"

A gentle sound was heard and his heart felt like being quenched.

"I'm sorry"

"Why? Out of all people in this world, why you are the one who finds it out? Why are you the one who knows my flaw? I've been trying to hide it all this time. Why do you find it out? Why can't I look good in front of you?"

She cried louder and louder for each question. For Clarisse, her biggest concern that she had hid for her whole time was her family background. She had tried her very best to live normally. The reason why she felt insecure was related to her family background. She had prepared her very best to one day reveal her biggest secret to her spouse. She wished to be a strong woman that could admit her flaw coolly, but she had never prepared herself that Kevin, the one that she loved, found out about it.

When you are in love, you wish that the one that you love will never find out your flaws. That was what she felt. She wanted to look good in front of him so when he told her that he had known. She felt like her whole world collapsed. Her strong wall that she had been building was torn down.

Listening to her cries, Kevin understood the reason then. I've crushed her pride.

He tapped her back slowly.

"The one that I want to marry is you. The complete version of you. I love you, not only your charms but your flaws. AND your family background is not your flaw. So please, don't hurt yourself this way. Please, let me love you."

I need you. I love you forever. I miss you. Those words might melt any women, but none of those would win over Kevin's pleading. Let me love you. The words that didn't ask for any feedbacks. His words definitely melted her wholly.

She was stunned. She could feel his sincerity. She felt so good to have a man loved her that much. She felt so blessed. She knew there would be no one else that would love her that way.
She hugged him back, but she cried even more. Kevin hugged her tighter. He was afraid that she would run away. He feared her hiding from him.

The two figures hugged each other in the dim light for a long time before Kevin heard the stable breathing from the figure that he held. Clarisse was tired after being emotional and crying for a long time which made her sleep in his warm embrace. Kevin then picked her up and gently placed her on the bed.

He tugged the quilt over her, then caressed her soft cheek. He sighed. He made an oath in his heart that he would never do anything that would make her cry. He felt suffocated by looking her crying.

He then stood up to let her rest well, but his hand soon was gripped.

"Don't leave me.",Clarisse muttered.

Kevin turned around and looked at the woman. Her clear eyes looked at him. He then laid beside her and put her head on his arm. Clarisse looked at him without blinking, feared that he would disappear.

No matter what, the insecure feeling wouldn't vanish with only a sentence. Clarisse who had been abandoned not only once, but twice. Clarisse who had been seen as the family breaker when she actually did nothing wrong. Clarisse who had suffered depression from all of those incidents in her very young age was feared than once again she would be abandoned. Thus, she had been afraid to fall in love. Thus, she trief to kill the love that she had for Kevin. Thus, she kept on telling herself that she didn't worth for Kevin.

"I won't leave. In this lifetime, I won't leave you.", he kissed her forehead.

Listening the reassurance from him calmed her fear and uneasiness. Clarisse slowly closed her eyes as response. She was really tired. She hoped that it was not a dream. She hoped that the time could freeze at that moment.