Book of Love: Rini One Shots

Boulevard of Broken Hearts

Summary: Ricky pines for the girl that he no longer can call his.

*Rini angst*

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It had been his fault. He knew that.

He had been beating himself up about it for the entire summer they were apart. He knew he made a huge mistake the moment he left that room in May.

He should've turned around, wrapped her in his arms, and gushed about how much he absolutely adored her, but he didn't. And now he must pay the consequences by watching the girl he loves love someone else.

He didn't expect her to welcome him with open arms when school first started, but he truly didn't expect her to be all lovey dovey with some jock that probably didn't know nearly as much about her as Ricky did.

Sure, he had spoken to a few girls over their break, but he talked about Nini the whole time which averted all of the girls he spoke to away. Not even once did she leave his mind since they split, and he was sure she wouldn't leave anytime soon.

The first week had been unbearable because he had to get used to them walking down the hall holding hands and being all cute with each other. And he had to see some guy kiss the same soft lips he missed. It made him want to puke.

It really didn't help that his parents were in the process of getting divorced. His mom had left to Chicago a month ago and started dating some guy named Todd who Ricky was not ecstatic to meet. His dad on the other hand stayed with Ricky in Salt Lake and had become fond of drinking a little too much.

Sometimes he'd come home to his dad knocked out on the couch with two to three empty Corona bottles on the ground. Sometimes he even forgot to prepare dinner. Not like his cooking was the greatest anyways. Ricky had gotten used to it by now, but that didn't mean he particularly liked it.

It could be worse. He could be beating Ricky or be an angry drunk, but instead he was just kind of a zombie. It was sad watching his dad slip into a deep depression that he couldn't help him out of. He was basically just a ghost aimlessly roaming the house.

He really wanted to talk about it with someone, but the person who he'd tell was currently on her honeymoon with EJ Caswell. She had known how to put him back together whenever he fell apart. Not even Big Red would be able to help him out of this dark period of his life.

One day, he had been on the rooftop of the school where him and Nini used to hang out sometimes during lunch when they felt like escaping. He had been writing in his songbook about everything going on to relieve stress whenever he heard someone coming up from the stairs.

He immediately looked to see who it was and froze when he noticed her. The girl who owns his heart was looking back at him with the same shocked expression. I guess both of them should've known that they'd end up seeing each other up here eventually.

She awkwardly and slowly walked over to him. She had stayed a good foot away from him. "Hey." She said giving him a polite grin.

"Hi." They both looked into each other's eyes wondering what to say next. She had been the first to speak. "What brings you up here?" She asks. He was debating on spilling his guts right then and there. He wanted to tell her all about his current home life and about how much he yearns for her love and affection, but he decided against it.

"I just wanted to blow off some steam. This place is very peaceful."

She began to become restless, which he knew was a sign of her becoming nervous. "Yeah I guess I'm doing the same. I just needed to look at a new scene."

They had stayed there in silence for a little while both of them were looking at some of the plants around them and the sky to avoid looking at each other. Ricky couldn't help but think about everything happening right now.

He really wanted to get up and kiss her until they both were breathless and weak in the knees like he used to. He began to reminisce on their relationship and how much he missed it. He hadn't even realized the warm tear that roamed down his cheek until he saw that she was looking at him with a concerned expression.

She had sat beside him and rested her hand on his knee. "Oh my god, Ricky are you okay?"

For some reason, the moment she asked he just broke down. He was so embarrassed that he was crying in front of his ex right now. He felt so weak and frail, but he just couldn't keep it inside anymore.

"I'm not okay Nini." Is all he could get out at the moment. He felt her grip his leg a little tighter, and he could sense her gaze on him.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He nodded his head before turning his head to look into her eyes.

"Everything in my life is wrong right now. I feel like I can't control anything anymore. My parents are split, my dad is in a deep depression over it and hasn't been the same, and I don't have the one person on earth that I care about the most by my side to make this aching pain in my heart go away because she's in the arms of some other man."

Her eyes also began to well up, and he felt bad for making her cry once again. She rested the hand that was once on his knee to his back and began rubbing it up and down soothingly. He really missed her touch and her comforting methods.

She was always so gentle with him. He felt ten times better than he has in the past few months just by one simple gesture. God he loved her so much. He could tell by her facial expression that she was genuinely concerned and felt sympathy for him, which he was happy about because that meant she at least still cared for him.

"Ricky, I'll always be here for you when you need me. Even though we're broken up, that doesn't mean I don't still care for you. Don't you forget that. You can come to me."

Ricky had allowed himself to let a small smile creep on his face as he wiped the tears that were coming down.

"I've missed you." He admitted as he looked down at his shoes not wanting to see her reaction. She was about to say something, but he had started talking again. "I can't stand seeing you with him."

Her rubbing had stopped, but she still kept her hand on his back. "Ricky..." Is all she could mutter out. He laughed with no humor. "You know I'll do anything to win you over again right?" He said this time letting himself turn his head to see her face.

She was left speechless and had just stared at him with a lost look. He had no idea what she was feeling right now. A buzz came from her phone snapping her out of her intense stare down with him. She made a blank face when she read the message.

"I should go." She said placing the phone back in her pocket. She had stood up, looked down at him, and it looked like she was waiting for him to say something. He immediately missed her touch and wanted to feel her warmth one last time before she left, so he got up and wrapped her into a bone crushing hug.

It clearly threw her off a bit, but she gladly reciprocated. She had let go first and reached up to kiss him lightly on the jaw.

"Take care of yourself Ricky. Don't let anything hold you down."

He didn't know what to say to that, so he just watched as she walked away to probably lie in the arms of another man.

He thought about chasing after her. He wanted to tell her to leave that guy for him so they can just be happy again. He wanted to turn her around and kiss her until both of their lips were chapped. But he knew it was wrong, so he let her go.

That's when he decided to get himself together and try to find a way to sneak his way back into her heart. He could tell that she wasn't fully invested in her current relationship because she doesn't give EJ that same toothy grin and hearty laugh like she gave him. He just had to make her realize it.

So he did what seemed to be the best way to win her back at the time, he was gonna audition for the play that she was auditioning for. That way he can spend time with her and have an excuse to hold her in his arms again. That also meant he had a reason to not be home as much.

He took her advice and decided that he wasn't gonna let his current struggles let him down, so he pulled up the movie and began practicing.

He was going to do everything to win her back because she was worth it. Whatever it takes.