Avenger's One-Shots/ IronDad & Spiderson

🥀Shit talking🔥

I am aware that it is canon that Steve Rogers knows Italian and Russian but for the sake of this chapter he only knows English

Bucky woke up in a fairly bad mood this morning. Sam and Steve were sparring and when they were walking past his room to go to the kitchen they talked way to loud, especially for his super-hearing ass. 

So when he walked into the kitchen looking pissed off and tired, Steve and Sam gave him a wave and whispered good morning.

Bucky ignored them and started making himself coffee when Natasha strolled in.

She also ignored the two men who said hello to her, sitting on the island in the kitchen, smiling at Bucky.

"Утро Джеймс" (Morning James). Natasha spoke.

"Утро, Наташа, хочешь что-нибудь?" (Morning Natasha, want anything?) Bucky asks politely. Natasha glances at the two men who were looking at them and glared at them before speaking.

"Немного чая пожалуйста." (Some tea please.) Natasha says looking back at a neutral faced Bucky who was a bit confused.

"Хорошо, почему, где ты смотришь на Стива и Сэма?" (Alright, why were you glaring at Steve and Sam?) Bucky asks while making her tea and handing it to her. He glares at the two a bit before taking a sip of his coffee.

"Ну, они были очень противны этим утром и разбудили меня, и я могу сказать, что Сэм случилось с тобой, так что давайте представим, что мы говорим дерьмо."

(Well they were very obnoxious this morning and woke me up and I can tell same happened to you, so let's pretend we're talking shit.)

Natasha states with a glare directed at the two. They started sweating, confused, and scared of what they did. 

"Вот почему ты мой любимый, Старк второй, но не говори ему, что я это сказал." (This is why you are my favorite, Stark is second but don't tell him I said that.)

Bucky says with venom dripping from his tone, glancing at the two who looked ready to shit themselves. 

The two Russians continued like this for quite a while. When Clint walked in and saw the two assassins speaking Russian very quickly and angrily while glaring at Steve and Sam, he turned right around and went back to bed. 

Eventually, the two left, but not without giving the two one final glare.

When they left Steve and Sam took a breath of relief.

"I have to ask Stark what they said," Steve stated, his head leaning on the table as he contemplated his life choices.

Sam shook his head.

"What if they find out! They'll kill us and our bodies will never be found." Sam exclaims.

Tony watched the whole thing happen and had FRIDAY translate it to him. He walked into the room nonchalantly desperately trying to not laugh and made himself some coffee. 

The two exchanged looks before Sam sighed and spoke up.

"Hey Stark, I got a favor to ask you," Sam says in a nervous tone. Tony raises a brow.

"Uh- Bucky and Natasha were just in here speaking Russian and looking at us like they wanted to murder us and we were wondering if you could translate it?" Sam asked with a shy smile.