Angels [a.s I]

4: The Persecution

Allana

I was shocked when I saw him again. It was as if the last time we met was an eternity ago. He has changed in many ways. He seems more mature, intelligent and strong.

I've always known that he has a certain...affection towards Padmé but I never expected him to...like her, kind of. When in fact I have had feelings for him since the age of twelve. We used to spend ages together, training in every field the Jedi do, and they made us partner up for many activities, and as a teenager girl you cannot avoid your heart to take over every now and then.

When I left towards Ryloth to continue with my training, I knew we'd meet again, just not soon. And when I returned he had left towards Ansion, therefore we never collided again until now.

I was meditating at Padmé's room as she got ready for bed with Dormé's help. I was thinking about everything that happened today and about what could happen. As my Master taught me, I was trying to anticipate myself for the future circumstances.

"Did you notice?" Padmé asked me.

"Notice what?" My eyes were closed as I took a deep breath and flashes were coming and going around my head, they were blurry, but I was still able to hear her voice and try to continue the conversation. I exhaled slowly.

"The way he was looking at you of course."

"I think you mean the way he was looking at you." I answered as I took another deep breath.

"What are you talking about?"

I exhaled. "I think he may be into you."

"Don't think so, his eyes were glued to you." I opened my eyes but didn't move. I was looking at the ships on the other side of the glass flying by and biting the edge of my bottom lip.

"Right." I whispered. I was sure that the feelings of the Jedi were not directed to me, they couldn't and even if they were, it could never work. Due to the fact that we swore loyalty to the Jedi Order as soon as we walked in the Temple, we basically gave up a life with attachments, a life where we could love whoever we want, get married, have a family, etcetera. All the things a girl dreams her future to be at a certain point in her life could never happen to me. Even though, I, actually, have gone against those rules in anyway. For seventeen years I've kept in touch with my blood family, when I shouldn't have, and now liking or in an extreme case loving him? Another Jedi? It's just forbidden and we would be forced to live a lie.

"It's true." My sister continued and I got up from the ground, turning around to face her. My arms were crossed over my chest. "Look. Sometimes, you're unable to see things, but others around you can. Specially me that I'm your sister. I'm telling you, he has feelings for you."

"Padmé he doesn't, besides, he cannot do it. It goes against the rules."

"Oh please, you said that he's into me a minute ago. Do you think that doesn't go against the rules either?" I sighed and looked away. The Senator has left me without any arguments, again. She giggled. "Didn't you see it?" She asked again, and I just shook my head. "Dormé did you see it?" She asked her friend.

"I did." She answered with a smile.

The heat of my face concentrated on my cheeks with the simple thought of it. "That's...no, just, no." I commented as a nervous laughter left my lips. "No, no, no, no. I don't-" I talked very fast. Like I do when I'm nervous.