C.J's POV
Fucking world and its fucking tragic deaths and car crashes and plane and train crashes and fucking every kind of crash there is. Every single time I see something like that happen it reminds me of my mom and why I left home. Alcoholic parents aren't the dream. It's not their fault though. Some of them have a reason. Some of them just wanna let out all their anger but they can't because what happened to them, ruined them and now they just keep everything to themselves and just drink up all their misery. At least I wasn't in the car but I really wish I was right now.
So much shit is happening. So much shit I wanna know. So much shit I haven't told anybody. So much shit that happened and makes me wanna just leave town leave the state, the country, and never come back. Should I tell Matt? Was it cheating? He kissed Bunny and was probably fucking her right now so why should I be worrying? He should be worrying about what I'm gonna do to him if he-.
My thoughts are cut off by two cars crashing into each other right in front me. That could've been me. That could've been me in the middle of that.Okay. I'm going straight home.
I drive slowly so I don't slip on anything. The rain was coming down hard and I was scared. I was scared about another car crash or my dying here today or Matt leaving me or Bunny killing me or just ending up with nobody. But who cares. It's my problem. I fucked up. And there's no going back. There's no fixing it. I ruined everything and no matter what I did I can't fix it now. It's too late.
Once I make it home, I run straight upstairs and jump in my bed. Can someone be traumatized by something that didn't happen to them? I ask myself.
-
Matt's POV
Now's my chance. She's finally home, and alone. Why wouldn't she be? She lives with me and me only. Why am I being so weird about this? Ew. What's that feeling in my stomach? Oh. I'm hungry.
I walk to the fridge and grab an orange. Why is there an orange in the fridge? Ok. I grab a root beer and walk back upstairs to my room. I grab the cheez-it box from under my bed and start snackin til I hear sobbing coming from C.J's room.
I put down the box and walk over to her room.
"Ceej." I knock on the door lightly.
"Ceej, you in there?" I open the door.
"Babe, what's wrong?" Shes sitting in her bed, some sheets on the floor, mud stains leading up to her bed where her shoes were sitting on the ground, tissues everywhere, her eyes red. I was confused. Did she already know what I was gonna say?
"C.J I-"
"No."
"I didn't know you-"
"Were gonna walk in?" She turns into her back to face me wiping tears off her cheeks.
"No. I knew that'd happen."
"So, why'd you do it Matt? Why?"
"I didn't."
"So, you're trying to tell me you didn't make out with Bunny?"
"That's not what I said."
"Well, explain you bastard!"
"I c-can't."
"Why? Because you're out of lies? Here, let me try. I wasn't enough for you so, you went out and got the closest thing to me since I don't have a sister left. You didn't wanna have sex with me because you thought you'd get gonorrhea so you went and called Bunny so she could give you herpes instead. Yeah, that's right, she has herpes. I'm not supposed to say anything but Taylor has it too. And you probably do too so I suggest you keep your huge mighty man noodle to yourself next time." She lets out a deep breath and lays back down.
"C.J I'm breaking up with you!" I yell.
"Oh, because you're embarrassed now? You can't handle this?"
"No, you can't handle this." I stand up and walk towards the door but quickly turn around.
"And Bunny's not pregnant, Taylor's in love with you, they don't have herpes, Lucy and I did hang out while I was away, know what I'm sayin?" I say making inappropriate gestures at her. "I love who I've become and know one's gonna change me, and I don't wanna see your face ever again. I want you to move out." I say. "You have a week."
"You can't fucking kick me out of my own house!"
"But baby, I just did."
"Whatever."
"Hey whore, one more thing. Guess who's moving in." I say smirking.
I gesture everyone to come in and they all jump in the room howling and yelling in each other's backs.
Taylor, Gilinsky, Nate, Sammy, Johnson, Mellz, the guy from the video store and the Jimmy Johns and Dominos delivery guy.
"What the f-"
"Man cave." They all shout and start tearing things apart.
"Matt! What the fuck?"
"What? All the guys you messed around with in one room doesn't turn you on?" I laugh.
"No! Get off of me!" She screams.
"You should've said that to Gilinsky the first time." I laugh at my gross joke and walk out, leaving her with eight horny adolescents fresh out the womb and ready to fuck.
"Matt! I'm sorry! I don't know what got into me. Every time I did something wrong it was to get your attention. I was jealous of Lucy being the one you lost your virginity to and me losing it to some loser who took advantage of me at a party. I wanted you to notice me and think I was cool and you'd want to hang out with me and be with me all the time and learn to love me. I just made way too many mistakes along the way and I truly am sorry. I know this doesn't make up for anything I've done but I love you. I always have and I always will. I didn't think this would get this out of hand. I know you'll hate me forever but I just want you to know that I'm sorry and I fucked up and I love you always."
I turn around after she finishes what she was saying. She's a total fuck up I've always wanted, but I love her too. That's why I have to leave. She's messed me up so much I can't handle it anymore. I'm done for a while. I'll always love her.
"Guess you should think about it before you go doin yo thang, and catchin feelins."
I shut the door behind me. That's it. That's the end of us.
For now.
THE END.
tysm for all the reads. it was fun writing this even though it wasn't even that good.
I hope you guys enjoyed reading it and I love you all.
xo.
-rx
