Can You Love Me Most? | 𝘙𝘦𝘮𝘶𝘴 𝘓𝘶𝘱𝘪𝘯

41| Heartbroken

"Selene?"

Monica was standing a few feet away from me, waves of concern and surpise shimmering through her eyes.

"Are- are you okay?" she asked.

I straightened my posture, rubbing my eyes severely, and forced out a restrained smile as the blonde-haired girl approached me.

"What happened?"

"N-nothing. Nothing happened." I sniffed, wiping a small tear in my cheek with the sleeve of my jumper to make sure that she wouldn't notice the sorrow in my eyes.

"What do you mean nothing happened? Of course, it's obvious. I know you. Tell me, what exactly happened?" Monica said incredulously.

My lip was trembling.

"He-he broke up with me." I muttered. "He pushed me away."

Monica's eyes shimmered with empathy, her lips pursed and I immediately attacked her with a bone-crushing hug, sobbing into her shoulder not able to control the sadness in my body. Monica was stroking my back.

"Has he left yet? I really CANNOT believe that Snape would tell the whole school his secret." Monica asked, very serious as she broke our embrace.

"I don't know. He told me to get out and I passed Harry on the way." I muttered, tears streaming past my cheeks.

"I'm gonna go talk to him." Monica said all of sudden, and attempted to go to the Defence Against the Dark Arts office.

"Don't," I croaked, grabbing her hand. "He might lash you out as well, you know how shocking it is to see him angry."

"I don't care," Monica said, the tone of her voice was very sincere and feisty. "He hurt you, and now look at the mess you are. I'm just gonna talk to him. Smoothly as possible."

She smiled, hoping that I too, would.

That was always the trick that Monica used throughout our seven years here when ever I felt under thr weather.

Because, whenever people were happy and smiling. Then I too, would be happy.

But this time it didn't work.

I didn't smile at all.

Monica released a sigh and patted my shoulders with a small smile.

"Don't worry. Why won't you go back to the common room? Eveyone's been so worried sick about you, and they surely want to see you." she suggested.

I slowly nodded my head and made my toward the Gryffindor common room.
I was met with the gloomy stares of the students as I passed through the hallways, and the chatter and whispers about Sirius' escape the previous night and Remus's resignation and newly discovered condition.

"Oi, Black! Is it true you're dating a professor?"

"Where do you think Black escaped?"

"Dunno. Ask his sister over there, she surely knows where he's hiding."

Questions and insults were quickly hurled toward me as I silently tried to go the common room.

"So Selene, is Professor Lupin's bed more comfortable than ours?" uttered the cold, cynical voice of Cormac Mclaggen as he and his friends roared with laughter; I stopped walking but did not dare to look at him, my face hanging low and starting at the floor. "I always thought the teacher's beds were small and uncomfortable but it turns out it isn't."

I felt my jaw clenching, as they continued laughing, so did majority of the students in the corridor.

Without second thinking, I immediately stormed away from the laughing crowd, starting to sob. I wiped the tears in my eyes furiously.

I passed the entrance to the Great Hall and flew down to the massive Grand Staircase to get to the common room as I ignored another round of the bustling students who were staring at me.

"Oddsbodikins." I muttered, reaching the portrait of the Fat Lady.

The Fat Lady peered at me, after gulping a drink of Pumpkin Juice in her glass.

"I'm sorry – what was that dearie?"

"Oddsbodikins!" I snapped in irritation, looking up from my shoes unto the warden of the Gryffindor common room, whose wide flew wide as she dropped the glass in her hand.

"A-alright there, take it easy Miss, cool down!" she stated as the portrait swiveled open, allowing me to step inside the common room and retreat from the judgemental stares, gossip and all the pain outside.

Despite the perfect weather, many of the Gryffindor students have gone outside, making the common room empty and silent besides a huddle of second year students who barely looked at me as I made my way.

"Selene! Hey!"

Luke was running toward me but I did not dare to look at him and walked toward the staircase that led to the girls' dormitory.

"What's wrong?" Luke asked worriedly, grabbing my arm.

"It's none of your business," I said coldly, finally having the courage to look at him and trying desperately to hold back the tears in my eyes. "Why are you even talking to me? Is it because you want me to spill everything about me and Remus?"

Luke furrowed his eyebrows together and shook his head.

"No- no that's it. I won't. Even if the whole school knows about it, I don't give a damn! I don't want to be a gossiper." Luke retorted.

"Just leave me alone." I muttered, leaving him downstairs as I made my way to my dormitory.

I had expected the room to be loaded with my roommates to immediately bombard me with questions and gossip. But to my surprise, it was empty. Nobody was there, and Monica had not returned yet.

Which was a good thing.

I guess.

I flung myself to my bed, and sobbed into the pillows, my stomach pressed against the soft and comfy mattress. I felt something smooth and flat touching my hand, quickly looking at it and grabbing it,
it was the present that Remus gave me during Christmas.

The two of us, in the Room of Requirement after the ball, dancing happily and kissing. When we said I love you for the first time.

I was the opposite state of the Selene in the picture. She was vibrant, happy and was blushing very hard as she danced. But look at me, sad, lonely and heartbroken. Carefully removing the picture from the frame, I pressed my knees against my chest as I curled up into a little ball in my bed.

"I thought you loved me." I whispered looking at a vivacious Remus in the photograph. My fingers trailed unto the top of the picture, middle of the two of us.

I'm sorry. But I can't forgive you for this.

Closing my teary eyes, I heard the paper tearing under my hands. And opening my eyes, I saw halfof the picture containing Remus was on the floor, the tear marks on the paper very visible.

I did not bother to pick it up from the floor and tucked the other half of the picture under my pillow.

There was no sign of tranquility anywhere. Just the dark and suffocating clouds and the turbulent seas that were engulfing me into a deep, hole of darkness and sorrow.