CXIV

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Oh my God, but how much stuff had he managed to cram in this room? He was filling the fifteenth fucking box and his room still wasn't empty. At this rate none of the other guys would be able to bring anything into that apartment. He grabbed his phone on a whim.
"Hey."
Brett's voice was soft, but he could hear the excitement in it.
"Hey. I don't know how much stuff you're bringing, but we may need another apartment for all of this shit."
Brett laughed.
"I know, right? I never knew how much crap I had! We may have to have a giant minimalism streak as soon as we all move in there, Eddy. But Todd says it just looks like a lot when you're packing it."
"Well, I hope he's right, or we'll be living in between moving boxes from now on. How many games do you think we will have doubles of?"
"Quite a few, I think. Or maybe even triples or quadruples. We can sell some stuff once we have an overview."
Eddy nodded to himself.
"That makes sense. God, there's a lot to do, and we're all preparing for the competition too."
Brett grinned.
"Yeah. But we'll make it work, Eddy. Don't worry too much."
"I'll try. See you later."
"Later!"

He shook his head as he put the phone down and started packing a stack of jeans into yet another box. Todd had rented a van, which would come in about an hour. One hour only, and for that hour this was still his room. He sat down on the bed. He could take one minute, one minute to look around him and just be here, right?
The room was the same it had always been, just with a lot more boxes in it. And empty shelves. His desk was there, where he had spent so much time trying to cram the French into his head that he had already forgotten. He glanced at the mirror with the crack, where he had learned to shave, through trial and error. A little spider was making it's way up and down the crack, trying to make a web.
Well. It could make a web all it liked because it wasn't like anyone else was living here anymore, right?
He blinked and got up with a shock. No time for that now. He looked out of the window at the view he had seen a million times. Where he had waited for Brett so, so often. Now he was waiting for a white van. He turned around and packed the last boxes quickly. Then he taped them shut and started carrying the first box down the stairs.

The last box seemed heavier than the others, somehow. He looked around his room one more time. Why were there tears pressing up at him now? Why? He was going to the place he had wanted to be forever! With Brett, and "out", at least inside the house. That single bed over there, where he had been so lonely so often, was no longer his. A new bed, a better bed had been bought and would be delivered to the house this afternoon.
Everything was good, but at the same time everything was weird.
He took one last long look and he was out of the door with the last box in his arms.

"Do you have everything?"
"I think so, mum. But if I don't I'll just come pick it up. I won't be far, and I'm coming for dinner tomorrow."
They had been so close these last few weeks, his mum and he, getting on so comfortably, like that earnest conversation he had had with her on Pool Day had taken away anything that had stood between them.
Well. Almost anything. There was still the giant, looming, treacherous, horrible secret that by now he was thinking he may always have to keep. He could just picture telling her that one now.
Oh yeah, mum, by the way, I'm gay.
Luckily his mum couldn't read minds and just gave him one of her gentle smiles.
"Good. I'll come by this evening when everything is in the house and I'll help you clean up."
"Thanks, mum. That sounds great."
He startled when the van hooted from the street.
"Wow." he said softly as he picked up a box again. "I guess this is it then, mama."



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