Jily oneshots

Redamancy

by matrixaffiliate

"I've done something dumb." Lily groaned as she looked up at Marlene from the sofa.

"If it's like every other dumb thing you've done, I'm going to my room."

"No, this time I've done something well and truly stupid."

Marlene eyed her from her lounge chair, skeptic to the last. "Out with it then."

Lily took a deep breath. "I told Petunia I had a boyfriend."

Marlene blinked. "Honestly, Lil, I thought you'd actually done something worth batting an eye at."

Lily groaned and tossed the card in her hand at Marlene. "Read that and tell me I haven't been an idiot."

Marlene shrugged and handed it back. "So Petunia gave you a plus one to her wedding for your non-existent boyfriend. Tell her that he can't make it because he can't get work off, or because he'll be with his family. Honestly, only your sister would get married on Boxing Day."

"Then she'll know I was lying!" Lily tossed the invitation on the sofa next to her. "The only reason she's even giving me the plus one is to call my bluff and then rub it in my face that I have no one and she has Vermin."

"I'd rather have no one than be saddled with that blob." Marlene came to sit next to her on the sofa. "Is it really that big of a deal? What if you brought me instead? My family doesn't have anything planned after Christmas."

"Yes and no." Lily leant against Marlene's shoulder. "I can't bring you because Petunia would kill me."

"Always happy to leave lasting impressions," Marlene chuckled. "Good to know that she hasn't forgotten it's not appropriate to infer a woman is a prostitute just because she enjoys leather pants."

Lily smiled at the memory, "Exactly. But I can't just show up alone because I'll never hear the end of how she sacrificed a seat at her wedding for my non-existent boyfriend and how awful and ungrateful a sister I am."

It was quiet between them for a moment and Lily tried to push away the dread building in her stomach by pulling her jumper tighter around her.

"Well, I guess you need a stand-in boyfriend."

Lily lifted her head from Marlene's shoulder. "A what?"

"Someone to play the part just for the day of the wedding."

"A fake boyfriend? Where on earth am I supposed to come up with a fake boyfriend in six weeks?"

"You could take Sirius," Marlene tapped her chin as she thought.

Lily shook her head. "No offense, but there's absolutely no way I'm pretending your friend with benefits is my boyfriend."

Marlene smirked but said nothing and Lily tried not to guess where her friend's mind was.

"Remus then?"

"He's with his family all that week. I'm not asking him to leave his mum just to be my date for one day. You know she's not doing well."

Marlene opened her mouth to say more but Lily cut her off.

"And before you say Peter, Petunia already knows he and Bridget got married last year."

"I wasn't going to say Peter," Marlene's smirk widened. "I happen to know that James is very much available the day after Christmas. According to Sirius, the Potters take Boxing Day as an excuse to not get out of their pajamas."

Lily felt her mouth go dry. "I can't ask James."

"Why not?"

"You know why not!" Lily fell back against the couch with a huff. "You do not ask the man you secretly fancy to be your fake boyfriend to your sister's wedding, and especially not when he'd rather be spending it with his family."