Broken American Girl (Michael Clifford - 5SOS)

25-Decisions/Sneaky Performance

-Kyra's POV-

1:30pm, 23rd July 2014

She left me too quickly. I've never seen a lifeless human in my lifetime- and I know that I definitely don't ever want to again. She lay cold and unresponsive. We called the ambulance and they took her to the hospital but there was simply nothing they could do, all the machines that she was hooked up to made no difference. The only thing we could do was let her go where she was needed. Our goodbyes lasted around 1 hour each so by the time she was covered and we had to leave it was at least 8:42pm.

I've made a promise to myself that I won't go back to Michael or any of the 5SOS guys ever again, so I'm moving out. It's official. But I'm not sure where I'll go or if Cara will come with me.

The pitch black sky told me it was no earlier than 11pm and I was sitting on the steps of the guys' tour bus, holding my 2nd cigarette in my left hand as I lit it with the lighter that I had stolen from Daniel. I didn't smoke much, but when I did, I really needed the stress to be relieved. I was visible to the group of girls waiting patiently on the other side of the fence, a lamppost illuminating the group. They often smiled and waved politely, I have no idea why they were out at 11pm though. They were still clueless to the current situation and the growing tension and awkwardness growing among the group of us on the tour bus, but the girls were smarter than they looked so I suppose they can tell something terrible had to have happened for me to be alone and smoking at the same time. The girls know me better than I know myself.

Michael was historical; even worse than me to be honest, Sophie had really grown on him and I suppose at some point he felt like her actual dad. He locked himself in the lounge at the back of the tour bus around 2 hours ago, but not before having harsh words and a small fight with Ashton. Loud music could be heard from where I was and I guessed that he was blocking everyone out. No one was talking to anyone else actually, the tension being too much so we just didn't bother. Actions really do speak louder than words right now. Daniel made it crystal clear that he was going to stay with me until I was 100% okay, as a friend obviously and to Michael's and Cara's dismay.

"Hey.." I turned and smiled towards Calum, who sat beside me and waved at the group of girls, a few fans giggled and smiled brightly at his wave. He seemed a little confused as to why I was smoking. The girls could probably hear us talking so we tried to keep it down.

"Relieves stress." I answered his silent question before inhaling and exhaling the smoke and chemicals. He nodded and looked out into thin air.

"How are you coping babe?" He asked softly, putting his arm around my shoulder and ruffling my wavy hair. Me and Calum were never close but when we needed someone to talk to without it getting very awkward, we were there for each other. Which does kinda make us close in some way or another.

"As good as I could be, how's Mike?" Calum shook his head, telling me that Mike hadn't made an appearance since my departure from the group 20 minutes earlier. I motioned towards my cigarette and he nodded, I passed it to him and he took a long drag before handing it back to me, exhaling deeply and sighing quite loudly.

"Didn't know you smoked." I joked, lifting the mood momentarily. I watched as Calum smiled lightly.

"I don't. It's just a 'in-the-moment' kinda thing, I have to want to smoke to do it, you know?" I nodded. I got up and passed the burn to Calum as I grabbed my neon green skateboard from my small compartment by the tour bus door and started skating around the surrounding pavement where we were parked for the night, the coldness of the wind nipping at my skin, making goosebumps form all over my arms on legs, my choice of vest and bed shorts not working in my favour at the moment. My scars weren't visible in the darkness which I was thankful for.