𝕕𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕖𝕕- 𝕞𝕒𝕥𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕠 𝕣𝕚𝕕𝕕𝕝𝕖

44-

mattheo's pov- 

I stare at her, unable to even comprehend the words that have left my mouth. She stammers. 

"What..?" She staggers to her feet and i follow, trying to calm her down. 

"I said-" She shakes her head, hands digging into her hair, tugging at her roots. 

"N-No, i heard what you said.." She's panting, grasping at her chest, her eyes frantic. I stare back at her, trying to hold my arm out to grab her and pull her back to me. There's this panic in her eyes, making me scared. Her lips part as she shakes her head. 

"God- Why would you say that to me ?" She groans, whimpering as she holds back tears. I shake my head, sighing. 

"What's wring with it..?" She gulps heavily, licking her insanely dry lips. 

"Everything is wrong." My heart sinks to the pit of my stomach. I stare at her, the win gusting past us. I shake my head, stepping forward, still trying to grab her and hold her close.

"Do you..not feel the same ?" She looks down, her fingers fidgeting with a skin on her thumb. 

"We- i don't know." I can feel the splintering in my heart, the sound of the ripping echoing through my ears as my heart rips and tears with every painful stare towards her. 

"God. I feel like a complete fucking idiot now." She shakes her head, tears rolling down her cheeks. She's grasping at her shirt, sniffling. 

"Mattheo, i don't even know what love feels like." She looks up at me, lips parting, and my heart stops. "Don't be mad." She sniffles. I walk up to her, finally being able to wrap her in my arms. 

"I'm not mad. I'm not." The shape of her small, shriveled body is shaking against mine, her hands gripping my jacket. She's sobbing into my chest as i wrap my arms around her, letting my chin rest on the top of her head. She's holding me close, her hands spreading around me, gripping the back of my shirt. 

"My whole life, I've never heard these words before.." I cup her cheeks, gently making her pull away. I loo down at her,, her cheeks, eyes and nose red. She sniffles. " S-So hearing it now is shocking." I smile slowly, kissing her forehead. 

"Parents are real shitty." She sniffles, wiping her nose on her sleeve. 

"More like deceased." I breathe out heavily, tucking her hair behind her ear. 

"Can't relate.. Not right now, at least." She steps away from me. 

"Yeah, i know." She takes a shaky breath, shaking her head as she wipes away her tears. "After we finish this task, i will-" she looks up at me, and her eyes soften. 

"Figure out how deeply i feel about all of this, okay ? I promise." Her voice is soft and subtle, the barest trace of it breaking making my throat knot up. I grab a cigarette out of my front pocket and light it, tucking it between my lips and taking a puff. She grabs my arm, pulling it to the side as she leans up, her lips hovering over mine. 

"Okay ?" She breathes out. I gently breathe out the smoke, making it go downwards, avoiding her face. 

"Okay, yeah sure." I go to connect our lips but she pulls away again. 

"Besides, i kinda have a plan." i look down at her. 

"A plan ?" She smiles, sniffling softly. 

"Yeah, a plan." I lean over, taking a puff of the cigarette in my fingers. She pouts. 

"I wish you wouldn't do that. It's so unhealthy." I sigh, pulling it away from my lips. I smile down at her. 

"Oh yeah ? What you gonna do ?" She grabs it and throws it on the floor, stomping on it. She looks up at me, prideful. I poke my tongue against the side of my inner cheek. 

"You little-" She slams her lips against mine, hands going to grip my hair. My hands find her waist and i slowly guide her to the tree, pushing her up against it. She butterfly kisses my lips, before pulling away and trying to speak. I cut her off, latching my lips on her neck, my hands running up her thigh and feeling the bumps on her skin. She whimpers, hands cupping the nape of my neck as my thumb finds her core and presses against it, the material of her underwear pressing against my thumb. She gasps, tucking her bottom lip between her teeth. 

"Matt-Mattheo." She whimpers, trying to get me to pull away. I hum against her skin. She cups my cheeks, making me pull away, my hand leaving her core and resting on her hip. 

"We have class." I roll my eyes pecking her lips. 

"You really wanna go ?" She sighs, kissing my cheek. She grabs my hand and starts tugging me along. 

"Come on, grumpy."