Stelle - Welcome to Florida

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A/N: As someone who's lived in the states most of their life, I can't even make this stuff up if I wanted. Welcome to Florida, at its finest <3. 

---X---


"The fifth misdemeanor in three days! Are you trying to set a record?" You felt the urge to shake the poor girl by the throat in sheer frustration. How could someone even conceivably commit these kinds of crimes without thinking about it? The idea went completely over your head as the officer relayed the extent of Stelle's charges. 

A quick look at the page sent your jaw to the floor. 'Three counts of attempted wildlife endangerment'? It wouldn't have been the first time Stelle had tried to wrangle something out of the yard, but an entire alligator!?

She shrugged, "Alligators are to Florida what pigeons are to New York." 

"Yeah, sure, if a Pidgeon could swallow you without chewing then ok Stelle."

You thanked the officer for letting your convict of a girlfriend out of her temporary holding cell. On the drive back home no matter how much she asked to drive you took control of the steering wheel. She grimaced, saying 'March would let me drive'. You fought the urge to just drop her on March's doorstep. 

It was a somewhat peaceful drive through the tropical air, and past the palm trees that danced slowly to the breeze. 'Somewhat' was the key difference as the moment you stopped for a gas break. 

"Stelle! NO!!" 

She had her torso halfway through a garbage can. "Normally there would be a profile in there-" 

"A what??" You fought the tears that threatened to fall past your face as you desperately dragged her back into the car.

Once you had managed to get the both of you back home, you thought that the troubles would finally be over. 

Your efforts proved to be in vain as you realized who had crashed at your shared apartment for a quick visit. Not even bothering to go inside you shoved Stelle through the door, with her pouting at the window. "Come inside Y/N, please~?" She widened her eyes like the damn cat from the Shrek movie.  

It wouldn't matter how much she pleaded, you refused to take a step into that house knowing what kind of monstrosity it would become once you did. What you weren't aware of was the mess that was brewing right under your nose.

"Stelle, I love you- but, I have to get groceries." 

"We can go with you Y/N."

"Absolutely not Jing Yuan get in the damn house." You scolded, he actually seemed dejected, joining Stelle at the window -pouting- though you couldn't see it through his lump of hair. You turned around before Yanqing could try the same trick, as it might've worked. 

It was as if a frat party had just arrived inside your apartment. Knowing that it could only be the fault of one individual, you gave up trying to fight it. Seeing the said individual pull into your apartment parking lot and nearly topple a few other cars you hurried out the door. Kafka probably had been drinking just before she drunkenly dialed everyone in the phone book. 

Stelle began banging on the door as if you had locked her in there. Arguably you had, but she was a grown adult! She could take care of herself, she had food, open windows and television. Groaning you realized you took care of Stelle like a dog in a hot car. 

The trip to the grocery store was luckily uneventful. The ride had been pleasant, and the weather had cooled down a bit. "106, huh, not bad." Placing your phone down you took out a small grocery list. 

"Sampo, I will kill you." You murmured looking at all the things you had previously written down having been crossed out. Replaced with the weird requests he had, 'Bread free milk'. 

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