Healing

Sixteen

"Okay" I watch as Meredith, Nancy and Amelia come out in three different colored gowns. Meredith is in a dark purple shirt dress, Nancy is in a red dress while Amelia is in a pink dress with ruffles at the top and bottom. Today John and I are picking bridesmaid dresses and we don't have a long time since we need to get back to the hospital "I'm not really feeling the dress Amelia is in, it's just too...loud. Babe?"

"She's right" John agrees with me "very loud"

"What about the other two dresses?" Maze asks me

I stare at them "I like the red dress Nancy is in but not the dress, babe?"

John stares at them "I like the dress Meredith is in, not the color. Is there a dress with the color Meredith is in?"

Shaking his head "I'm sorry but we do have more dresses in the color Nancy us wearing"

"How are you doing Luna?" Kathleen asks me "we heard what happened-mom dying, your sister almost and you killing your self"

"I'm okay" I say, I still have to tell Richard and Meredith about Maggie. She called me and we spent two hours talking to one another.

When the girls come out again in the red colored dress that John and I like, we see three different dresses but the one I like is the one Amelia is wearing "I love the dress Amelia is wearing" it's this wine colored dress with a halter neck backless short dress "it's stunning. John?"

"I don't know" he tilts his head "it seems very short...how would you feel if the dress was longer?"

I look at it "Only if it's mermaid style" looking at the consultant "does the dress Amelia is wearing come in a mermaid style?"

Nodding his head "It does"

"Okay" nodding my head smiling as I look at John, he smiles back "then it looks like we have our bridesmaid dresses. All we need now if cake tasting and you and your groomsmen tuxes"

"Where will you two be living by the way?" Maze asks us

Oh my god "Holy fuck, she's right...we've never had sex"

John is confused "I'm confused, not about the sex part" he makes clear "I get that we haven't had sex yet" saying yet like we will do it eventually just not now "yet, but how did you get where we will be living to sex?"

"No offense Mere" I quickly say "but the house me and Meredith grew up in is basically a youth hostel, we're the only couple who hasn't had sex in that house sure you've spent the night but only to sleep. Nothing more-I mean yes I've fucked many people for years since I was twelve"

"I have" John cuts me off "many questions about that still"

"Like what?" I ask as Meredith asks "Are you sure?"

Nodding his head "Who was the first guy you've ever slept with and how old was he?"

I think about that, after like five minutes "I don't know his real name but he went by Snake"

"Snake?" He asks

"Snake?" Meredith asks, we look over at her "Wow I did not picture him to be your first choice"

"Who did you picture?" I ask

"I assumed you wanted it easy" shrugging her shoulders "not someone like...him"

"Who was this Snake?" Mia asks

"Drug dealer" we both say, they stare at us as we leave the store "turns out he sells pharmaceuticals now and he was like sixteen when we hooked up"