❝And she did the drugs for fun
But now she does them just to stay up❞
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I'm a half smoked cigarettes girl, a tiny tops and eye glitter girl, a quick and cheap girl. The female version of a playboy. Sexy, sweet, sour, anyth...
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I had gotten two hours of sleep for the past two days. Having a teething child means if she's miserable, we're all miserable. Jack was in the kitchen making coffee at 3am.
"Can't sleep?" I asked wrapping my hands around his waist. He leaned his head into my shoulder.
"Not with our miserable child." He said, gesturing toward Evie's bedroom door. I shrugged.
"Got plenty of time to kill." I said, sliding one of my fingers against his boxers. He turned to face me.
"I like the sound of that." He said, kissing me sliding his hands up my shirt so both his hands were on my breasts. I felt myself pulling at the drawstrings of his sweats. He exhaled and I felt the rush of air in my own mouth. I knelt down in front of him and he tangled his hands in my hair.
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"Is it just me, or is married sex better than regular sex?" Jack, asked laying down next to me. I nodded.
"It would seem that way. " I said, standing up and pulling on a t shirt. Through the entire ten minutes I'd been away from her, my baby would not stop screaming. I scooped her out of her crib rocking her back and forth.
"Hi beautiful, what can mama do for you?" I asked, as if I expected her to reply. Jack and I had been married for three days now, and our child was still miserable. Domestic bliss I suppose. I walked into the living room flopping onto the couch with her.
"Alright, if you're not going to sleep, how about some videos?" I asked again, clicking on the tv. Jack walked into the living room raising his eyebrows.
"What's with the dancing strawberry?"
"Baby sensory videos."
He rolled his eyes to the back of his head. He can roll his eyes all he wants but our daughter did stop screaming and began cooing. I gave my husband a smug look. It was times like this, I wanted my mom and sister. Because they could tell me why she stopped wanting to breastfeed, they could tell me how to deal with the diaper rash she had, or how to deal with her not sleeping unless it was in my arms. Or why she didn't want me to put her down. Those were woman things. I had no mom friends, or mother or sister to tell me how to raise a child.
"Would you think its cringe if I went to one of those mommy groups?" I asked Jack. He audibly laughed and I glared at him.
"Yes, yes I do." He replied, taking a sip of his cold coffee.
"I want advice, I don't know what to do with this kid she's miserable." I said.
"Katie, she's miserable because she's a baby, you don't need mommy friends." He said reaching on top of the tv for his pack of cigs. Evie at that moment stopped babbling and flicked her eyes shut. I breathed a sigh of relief. I cradled her gently in my arms. Her body, still so tiny in my arms I smiled. It was then, that I felt my own eyes flicker shut and my body sink sideways into the couch.
"Oh shit." I hear Jack say and felt him taking Evie from my numb arms. Our couch, was not very comfortable but right now, there was no place I would rather be. I heard Jack talking to Evie. It was a weird adjustment, watching my drug dealer, fuck buddy, hard ass homie turn into the father of my child, and a husband. I felt him lay down next to me, pulling me into him. I hope for a while, it would always be this good between us. But some part of me, knew a crash was coming. Because, when things went well for too long it meant, things went south fast.
"Jack?" I whispered.
"Im sleeping." He said. I rolled to face him.
"What if she ends up like us?" I ask. Jack shrugged in the dark.
"She should be so lucky, We're pretty fucking cool."
