Breaking Free | Natasha x OC

Chapter Thirty-Eight

"The hardest time to say goodbye is when you have to, but don't want to."
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Natasha got off of the meeting with Okoye and Rocket. Carol was apparently doing something important and Naye hadn't been heard from in awhile. So far those two women had attended the meetings together but Naye hadn't been present in the last several.

Natasha pushed the laptop away and immediately that same hopeless crying overtook her. There was no specific reason for the tears anymore, other than everything. It was just this constant heavy sadness the blonde carried with her, hitting her in random moments with a despair so suffocating it was hard to move.

Steve had started counseling, helping people dealing with the loss caused by the snap... and Natasha was here, same as every other day. Going through the same steps, the same motions, over and over again. Alone.

She had her hands cupped over her nose and mouth for a few seconds as she took deep breaths in, Nat trying her hardest not to spiral further. There was work to be done. She couldn't fall behind, she still had a job. A cause. A purpose. The whole reason she'd become an Avenger in the first place. To keep humanity safe.

So she held her post, kept going with her job- a job no one else was doing anymore. She had no other choice. It was one of the few ways she could try make up for everything she'd done and so she'd keep going. Day in and day out.

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Nat moved the countless papers and technology around. She'd been thinking over the weeks... so many kids were left orphaned. Since the snap about one quarter of children had been left with no parents.
Tara had been right about some things. The snap would cause things like trafficking and sex rings to collapse in some places, but was it also helping those same illegal organizations? Surely it would've been. All those kids, parentless, it could cause so many new problems...

The thoughts caused another pang to run through her. This was another topic she couldn't discuss with her wife. Something as simple and big as this. God, she missed the redhead more than anything. It had been three months and a part of Natasha died every day that passed without a word. Her thoughts had begun to take dark turns and she struggled to keep ahold of them, no matter how illogical they grew.

A knock on the door had her looking up. She must've lost track of time and the days for Steve to be here now. He was really busy lately and couldn't always be here. Nat did that a lot lately though, lost track of time.

"Come in," She called, hoping she didn't look as disheveled as she felt.
The door opened and she looked up, already planting a not entirely genuine and small smile on her face before it froze.

"Hi."

Her blood stopped at the green eyes she saw instead of the blue ones she'd been expecting. Her heart beat so loud that Natasha could hear it in her ears. The air blew forward from outside and that scent of perfume hit her. That smell she knew better than anyone's.

Natara stood in the doorway, in her usual immaculate clothing. She wore a pair of formal, white, straight legged plants with a belt and a solid black sleeveless blouse, gold watch on her left wrist and necklace around her neck.

And as those green eyes met Natasha’s, as that familiar small smile faded...
Nat's face crumpled, a small broken noise escaping her chest and exiting out of her throat.