Last First Kiss

Chapter 24

~Destinee~

I stared at the same spot Harry had just been in for about an hour before I finally laid down on his side of the bench and cried. When I realized that he was actually gone, I got up and ran home. I ran inside my house and into my kitchen, crying like a crazy person. My mom was in the kitchen baking something and I ran up to her and hugged her.

Her arms were instantly around me. "What's wrong, honey? Why are you crying?" She asked immediately worried.

It's times like these that I was glad that I had my mom. "Harry is gone!" I sobbed into her chest.

"He broke up with you?" She asked as she rubbed my back gently.

"No! He died, mom! He's dead!" I told her and cried harder as I spoke those words.

"What?! How?!" She was completely shocked.

She moved us to the dining table where we sat down and I explained everything to her. Every single detail. I told her everything that Harry had said and by the end of it, even she was crying.

*****

I spent the rest of my summer in agony and depression. I still couldn't believe that he was gone forever. My summer was probably the worst in the whole universe. I never stopped crying, I barely ate, and I've wasted about five large garbage bags filled with tissues. The worst thing was that I couldn't see anything but his face.

It's currently midnight and I'm here in this wretched park, just like every other night, laying in the grass and looking up at the stars, hoping that one of them was him. I never thought that I'd lose him that way, in one of the worst ways possible...death. It brings me torture just thinking about it.

The grass was damp and soft and my hands were folded on top of my stomach.

I could remember his family's reaction. It was clearly very unexpected to them. His mother and brothers suffered a great deal, but his father knew that he was going to do it. He thought that Harry wouldn't have done it by thinking about his family and me, but that morning, he felt it. Harry was gone. His family tried to comfort me just as much as I tried to comfort them in return, however, his father only stayed in his office in pure depression of losing his most loved son.

I continued to look at the stars, my eyes searching for one that could possibly be him, but my vision was interrupted by a set of eyes. Their depth was endless, so beautiful, and they sparkled, but then I realized... his face was blocking my vision. I couldn't stop thinking about him and it was frustrating me. I know I said that I wasn't mad at him, that I understood his choice, but was it so wrong just to feel angry? To feel angry because I'll never be able to see him again and because everything I see just so happens to be him?

Like this morning. I had looked in the mirror this morning and I thought I saw him in the reflection, but when I turned around, it was only my imagination.

Why couldn't I move on and do the one thing he requested me to do? Why does it have to be so hard?

I curl into a ball and the tears started again. I don't even know how I'm going to survive the rest of the year...

I lay there, crying, for a while. I knew that I should calm down before I went into a stronger depression than before. I wasn't ready for that again.

I wiped my eyes and turned back up to face the stars.

They were undenyingly gorgeous. Some sparkled blue while others in yellow, but they were all the same... they were all perfect.

Just like him...