Never Ending Change

Chapter 48

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Chapter forty-eight

"Yeah sure," he said uncertain, "what is it?"

"Let's sit on the porch," I said and sat on the steps of his porch.

He sat down next to me and said, "You’re making me nervous. Is something wrong?"

I'm making me nervous too, I thought. I took a deep breath and started telling him what I felt. "I need to confess something. I feel like I've been holding back a big secret from you. A lot of people now know about it and I want you to find out about it from me and not someone else."

He interrupted me and said, "It's okay. I know what you want to tell me. Sabrina told me."

I paled. Sabrina told him? She's definitely trying to sabotage me. I breathed and said, "What do you think? Of me?"

He smiled and said, "It's ok! Your mom being in rehab is no big deal. She's human and it’s okay for her to make mistakes. And you're still a great person."

I was confused. "Clearly I've been holding back more than just one thing from you," I muttered.

"What are you talking about?" He asked me. He was confused as well.

I sighed. "I'll tell you but please don't stop being friends with me," I warned.

"What?" He asked almost appalled, "I'll never stop!"

I took in deep breaths and then started, "I have kept this from you for so long but I guess I can't keep it away from you forever. I want you to hear this from me and not from anyone else."

He nodded.

"I like you. I like you more than a friend would. I didn't want you to find out because now you won't look at me the same way you normally would. I didn't want to ruin things between us. I don't know if I can change the way I feel about you, but I like you. Maybe even more."

Ben stared at me in shock.

"Aren't you going to say something?" I asked.

"Are you serious?" He asked in a state of shock.

"Yes, I am," I told him.

He sat in silence and stared at me. I freaked him out, I knew this was a bad idea.

I got up and decided to go to my walk home so that I can get my car and drive to the park. When I started walking halfway, I heard him call out my name. I ignored him and kept on walking.

He appeared in front of me in an attempt to stop me. "What?" I asked in a cranky tone.

"You really mean that? Do you really like me?" He asked.

I kept my head down, "I do, but if you don't like me back then we can go back to being friends. I promise I won't let my infatuation with you get in the way of our friendship again."

He chuckled as he put his finger under my chin and lifted my head up. He smiled and bent down to brush his lips against mine for a second. He looked back into my teary eyes and said, "I don't think we can go back to the way we were. I have a little secret too. I like you. I like you a lot."

I smiled and threw my arms around him. I buried my face in his chest as he tightly put his arms around me too. His heart was beating really fast, faster than it should have been. Was I causing his heart to flutter?

"Thank God you like me back!" I exclaimed.

He pulled away and wiped my tears with his thumb. "I'm sorry I made you cry," he whispered.