Life is Liz (LiL, #1)

Chapter 20: Andromeda

I'd like to dedicate this chapter to Obsessedwithbooks11 for voting on LiL and also for adding it to a reading list. I literally squealed when I got the notification. 

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We look up at the same stars, and see such different things.

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"Where's Ryan?" Those were literally one of the first words my mom said to me when I arrived at home.

I shrugged, not really in the mood for any kind of family interaction. I was beyond exhausted after the session with my therapist and the team bonding event at Jeremy's, so some family time was basically the last thing I wanted at the moment. "At home, I guess."

"Did you invite him over?"

"Yeah."

"What did he say?"

"That he had plans."

"Oh, okay. Another time then, I guess."

I nodded as I made my way to the living room, plopping down on the couch. My dad was watching tv, sitting in his usual position in the armchair. "Hey pumpkin. Did you have fun with the guys?"

"Yeah."

"How was your appointment with Dr. Goodman?"

"Good," I answered. The same response he got every time he asked. Every Saturday I spent with Dr. Goodman.

"Anything I should know?" I shook my head in answer, the way I always did when he questioned me about it.

Earlier today I had talked with Dr. Goodman partly about my fight with Logan, but mainly about my family. I was lucky that I had the family I had. After all not everyone gets so much love from his parents. But sometimes the loneliness I felt when all of us were together was hard to bear. Especially when Nathan was with us and he couldn't stop talking about anything and everything. 

I was trying to accept the fact that they ignored me whenever I wanted to tell them something that was important to me. But because the things I had to say were not significant or interesting enough for them they didn't want to listen. Only if I wanted to talk about personal stuff about me or about my friends they found it in them to listen. So, I decided it was best to talk as little as possible to them. 

Because if they couldn't listen to the things I was passionate about they didn't know the person I was.

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Half an hour later I managed to sit through the whole meal without snapping. But I couldn't wait to get up to my room. 

So when I finished dinner I went to the kitchen to get me a bottle of water. However, I felt awkward. Fidgety and nervous. I've felt nervous before, but not like this. Never like this. My heart felt like it would jump out of my chest from so much new found energy. 

I tried to steady my breathing, taking slow deliberate breaths while leaning against the kitchen counter. Something wasn't right. My chest felt lighter and heavier at the same time. "Where have you been today?" Tori asked, joining me in the kitchen.

"Er... I met up with Ryan and Logan and some other friends," I answered her, my voice sounding strained. However, I was grateful for the distraction.

Something flashed through her eyes. "Do you think Ryan is a good friend?"

I narrowed my eyes at her. She never dug deeper when it came to my friends. Sure, my family liked to joke about some of my friends being potential boyfriend material, but never before had she asked me something upfront and maybe also doubtful about them. Especially when she didn't know them. "Why?" I asked slowly, unsure what to expect.