Push to the Limit (the sixth book in the Glee series)

Chapter 14: Good Intentions

Question for the future... Do you prefer getting back to back chapters but they are kind of short or chapters at the rate that I go now but they are super long? This is a long chapter which is what I've been doing lately, so let me know if you'd prefer them to be shorter than this in the future.
-------------------------------------------

Jake's footsteps were the only sound heard as he entered the only synagogue in Lima. It was across the street from a Lutheran Church and while Jake had been living with Kitty she did not allow him to go anywhere near the area, which she said she didn't trust. But it was now the place where he had chosen to go to for answers. 

["Father" by Demi Lovato.]

Jake: Father, I'm gonna say thank you. Even if I'm still hurt. Oh, I'm gonna say bless you. I wanna mean those words...

There weren't very many people inside but Jake spotted his family together in the front row. His mother, his half-sister, Puck's mother... The only person missing was—

Jake: Always wished you the best. I, I prayed for your peace. Even if you started this... This whole war in me.

The doors opened up again behind him and Jake spun around. His brother Noah Puckerman entered, his hands in his pockets as he joined Jake in song. 

Puck: You did your best or did you? Sometimes I think I hate you. I'm sorry, dad, for feelin' this. I can't believe I'm sayin' it.

Together they began walking towards the front to join their mothers. Jake kept his head hanging low as the sound of Puck's voice echoed around the small building. 

Puck: I know you were a troubled man. I know you never got the chance to be yourself, to be your best. I hope that Heaven's given you... a second chance.

When they reached the front door they sat down and each of their mothers placed a kippah over their heads. 

Puck: Father, I'm gonna say thank you. Even if I don't understand. 

And it was then that, as Jake remembered all the horrible memories he had of his father, he realized that now there wasn't any time left to make up for that. Those were the memories he and Puck and Puck's younger sister would all be left with.

Jake: Oh, you left us alone. I guess that made me—

They turned to look at each other and then simultaneously shifted their gazes to the bimah in front of them. 

Both: Who I am

Their mothers were sad. 

Jake: Always wished you the best. I, I, I pray for your peace. 

They were sad. 

Both: Even if you started this. This whole war in me.

But still, Jake had to admit that it wasn't as heartbreaking as a father's death should be. And that was what hurt most, what sickened him and filled him with guilt. He felt a bit of relief knowing his father was gone and at peace.

Jake: You did your best or did you? Sometimes I think I hate you. I'm sorry, dad, for feelin' this. I can't believe I'm sayin' it. 

As he and Puck continued to sing, Jake regretted that he never had the chance to make things right. He knew that wasn't his fault—it wasn't on him—but it still stung. 

Both: I know you were a troubled man. I know you never got the chance. To be yourself, to be your best. I hope that Heaven's given you...