Sick Man and The Kiss

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     I sit alongside everyone else in the nurses office, my fists held tightly in a clasp. My heart seems to take over everything around me, and the more I think, the louder it gets. What happened to him? Why did he pass out? Is he going to be alright? Is it just minor or major? Has he been working himself to hard? What is taking so long? Why am I so worried?

     "Drew." Dean states and I look up, my body feels cold and my vision is hazy. "Are you alright?"

     "No." I state plainly as I look to my feet and he shifts his weight causing his shoes to squeak. "I mean... What's going on?"

     "Well.... He hasn't really been sleeping much due to the fact that he's been going to see that chick... Maybe it's just exhaustion?" He mumbles as he sits beside me. So...... It's my fault? "Hey hey? Why are you crying?!" He asks and I sniffle as he wraps an arm around me. "He's gonna be alright Drew."

     "It's just scary!" I bark and cover my face with my hands. "I..... Knew I shouldn't have came here." I mumble as I stand up and turn my back on him.

     "Where are you going?" He asks eyes wide and I shake my head.

     "On a walk." I spit it out like poison and take off.

     My body rushes past people and through uncut grass as it cuts my legs. Really, I have no idea why I'm crying? Possible it's because anytime I begin to have fun it crashes down? I don't really know... No matter what though, I have always been able to run away from whatever is currently bothering me.... My body easily collects drops of sweat as I slow my pace and round a corner. My feet lose traction as I slide down a sandy hill and my arms slip into the lake. I let out a grunt as I sit up slowly and the water rolls down my arms.

     "What is wrong with me?" I whisper as I let out a laugh and shake my arms. "Always running off when something goes wrong..... Making it all about me..... How selfish can I be?" I shake my body as I walk along the bank and kick the sand. "I don't deserve any of them.... Kenny, Ms. Tina, Daisy, Violet, Charlie, even Dean.... I don't deserve them...." My voice feels quieter than usual and my shoulders slump in disappointment. "Really... I didn't deserve my parents.... That's why they are gone...." I stop a shirt distance from the pier and look over as my heart bangs in my chest. The lapping water beckons me and I shift my weight as I step forward. This is what I have to do... The planks creak as I step onto them and walk down.

     This is what you have to do... This is the only way to get out of your situation.... So do it.... The voice is low and rough as it echoes in my head. A voice I have come to know even before I came to this camp. You can't love anyone.... You'll just hurt them, or yourself. Ahh, his usual speech... So do it..... Put your head under the water and stay there. I kneel down and peer over the boards. My reflection stares back at me, and far far below, a glint. My eyes flick to it, and I watch as a hand reaches out towards me. My body lurches back as I shake my head.

     "Please stop...." I mumble as I push my hands against my ears. "I'm sorry you didn't get what you want so stop torturing me!" I scream and my body shakes as I look around. It's quite all around and the water has no odd glint hiding under the sand. My body slowly rises and I turn back walking away from the lake.... The very last time.....

•*•*•

     "Drew!" Ms. Tina sighs a large breath of relief as I step back into the office. "Where were you?!"

     "Out for a walk..." I mumble and she sighs as she pats my back. "What?"

     "Charlie is awake." She says smiling and my body tenses up as I look into the room. Surely enough there he was laughing and talking with the others.

     "What happened?" I mumble as she takes a deep breath.

     "You know how he's been searching for that girl?" She asks and through a pound in heart, I nod. "Well, he's been using all his time looking for her so he hasn't eat hardly anything or slept." She mumbles and I clench my fists together as I bite my lip. "Do us all a favor Drew..... Tell him."

      "Wait what?" I ask eyes wide and she nods firmly. "How do you...."

     "You honestly think I didn't notice how you left every night?" She asks and smiles at me. "Please Drew.... I was a teenager once too... Now, go and see him." Giving me a light shove I'm pushed inside and they each look up. Charlie stares at me eyes giving me a sad look as I mumble.

     "Don't ever be stupid again." In return, I get a broad smile and my heart bangs widely in my chest. Once more, a question forms in the back of my mind. Why does he make my heart pound?

•*•*•

     "Okay okay okay." I laugh as he strums on the guitar with a chuckle. "You have to eat!" Hiding once more in my shadow I giggle and he nods. "Why didn't you eat?"

     "I was looking for the girl who fits the slipper." He states and my gaze shots downward.

     "So it's because of me?" I mumble and he stands up. "I'm sorry.... Maybe I shout just tell you."

     "Unacceptable." He states and I look up just to see his shadowed figure in front of me. "I want to find out myself... I'm going to win the show and that's when I'll find out who you are..." He mumbles pushing forward and he gently takes my hand. "I just need something to keep me going..."

     "Like what?" I whisper and his head lowers down just enough I can feel his breath hot against me.

     "Connect the dots." He mumbles and just like something gentle and soft, his lips brush over mine. From a brush to a press against one another and all around me I feel him. His hand in my cheek and my arms around his neck. I'm completely enveloped by him. This isn't right, I really should be telling him.

     Ahh but I can't breath right now.... This very thing makes me want to stay. Can this be what I felt so long ago? Or actually what I thought I felt.... Can I really be coming back to my old self again? If so then please tell me this is real.... Because if it is and this feeling is what I think it is....

     Then I never want this summer to end...

•*•*•

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