The Forgotten Tards

Ch. 71

/Jamie/

"Hello Jamie, I'm Dr. Grimes, and do you mind if we talk?" The doctor questioned me. I stared ahead, at the wall, not feeling anything or moving. My eyes were glued to the sight in front of me for no reason.

The wall suddenly had the blood he spilled on it and I squeezed my eyes shut for a second. I reopened them and took a quick glance at the 'doctor'.

She must of been the doctor they paged from the 'physic ward', whatever that is.

"I don't have a choice," I mumbled as she pulled up a chair next to me and sat down. I continued to look ahead of the wall, the flashbacks still vivid in my mind.

I hope my siblings were okay, speaking of that, where were they?

"Do you know where my sister and brother are?" I questioned her.

"Don't worry, they are safe, I assure you." She calmly reassured me.

She couldn't promise that, no one could......

"Can I see them?" I asked her, getting to the point. I needed to make sure that the ones that were still alive were okay. Automatically, a flashback of Chris getting shot came into my mind, but I pushed it out, not wanting to feel anything.

"How about later. Now, how are you feeling?" She questioned me.

"I'm okay, everything will heal soon, hopefully," I informed the doctor. I knew the brushing would go away but I knew that there might be a small scar where my incision was.

"No, how are you feeling?" She asked me.

In that moment, I knew she wasn't talking about my physical health. She was talking about something else, and I didn't want to tell her what I was feeling.

I was feeling like I could of done better, could of been a better sister, daughter, friend, anything. I could of saved him, but he had to get shot not me. The innocent die in this world, and he died right in front of me.

I didn't want to feel anything, but I felt many things. Guilt, pain, remorse, sadness, anger. Yet at the same time, I felt like time was moving so slow yet so fast and that I was just feeling nothing. Like I was nothing, I could of done better, been a better person.

Every time I shut my eyes, a nightmare ran through my head. Nightmares are what my world is filled with these days- never ending nightmares. I could see the pain, feel the hunger pains, feel the bruises, feel the wrath of the words her screamed at us. And most importantly, see the blood.

Everywhere I turned, everything was red. The blood wouldn't just go away- hell, there would be more of it. There was already more blood spilled than it should of been, and I was coated with it.

I wanted to shout, to scream; the pain just built up inside of me and was never ending.

"I'm fine," I told her, giving her a small yet fake smile. The look in her eyes knew I was lying, but I could tell she wasn't convinced either.  I looked down and played with my fingers, only to have a flash of Chris's blood on them.

I immediately went wide eyed, and started to shake. I looked up and realized she was looking at me, so I tried to calm myself down. I was successful for a few seconds before she spoke.

"Jamie, you can talk to me, I'm here to help," She calmly explained to me.

"Like I said, I'm fine," I told her, with a fake smile.

"What are you feeling, that makes you feel 'fine', as you say?" She questioned me again. I was getting fed up with these questions but didn't have the urge to stop her.

I looked into her eyes and the look I gave her gave it all away; that I wasn't fine. In fact, I was far from fine, and I might never be fine again. I'm just another broken soul, and I'm only a teenager.

"I don't wanna talk about it, just leave me alone," I spoke in a small voice, looking down at my blanket. I could hear her stand up from the chair.

"If there is anything you need, you can talk to me. Jamie, you can talk to anyone, they will understand," She told me, walking out of the room.

Once she left, I was left with the beeping of the hospital machines again.

"They will never understand." I whispered to myself.

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Short chapter!

Next chapter will have the other kids point of views! Also, I am not going to edit the rest of the nook until I finish it!

Thanks for reading and voting!

Ily guys 💓💓