Despondent | (Completed but editing)

Chapter 29.

"Wake upppp," I whine, poking Jason's shoulder.

"I'm up," he says in his sleepy voice, his eyes fluttering open.

"College today baby, remember?" I say, kissing his forehead before sitting up and rubbing my eyes.

"Shit, yeah," he says, sitting up and resting his head on my shoulder.

"I have the worst headache," I say, rubbing circles into my forehead in the hopes of relieving the pain in my head slightly.

"I'm gonna go and shower and see if the others are coming into college today, okay?" I say, shrugging Jason off of my shoulder.

"Let me get in the shower with you," he says.

"Uh, why?"

"Because you take forever and I can't be bothered to wait for you, plus the others can go down to Drew's flat to shower," he says.

"Fine, no staring though," I tell him, placing my feet on the floor and walking across the cold, hardwood flooring. Jason follows me into the living room where Drew and Harper are sitting.

"Oh you guys are awake?" I say when I see them on the sofa watching TV.

"Yeah," Harper says, turning the telly down to hear me over it.

"Are you guys coming into college today then?" I ask, grabbing two towels from the clean pile on top of the drawers in the corner of the room. They both mumble a yeah, and I turn around to face them once again. Jason is standing against the door frame, looking as if he was about to fall asleep standing up right there.

"Lana, could I borrow some clothes for today? I don't have time to go to the dorms and get changed and make it to my first class if I do that, and Drew said I could have a shower at his?" She asks me and I nod, pointing towards the pile of clean washing that I hadn't yet folded and put away yet.

"Thank you," she smiles, picking out a plain black t shirt and some black leggings.

"You guys bang really loudly by the way," a sleepy Jason says from the doorway. We all look at each other awkwardly, before I begin to walk out of the room.

"He's not lying," I giggle, walking out of the room and into the bathroom.

-

"Daddy, why doesn't mummy like me anymore?" I ask my father, sitting next to him on his black sofa.

"She does sweetie, she just, thinks you're," he stutters.

"Thinks I'm what?" I say, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Different."

"Is it because I'm always sad?" I ask him innocently.

"Yes, Lana, most 9 year olds aren't this way."

"I can't help being sad, one day I just woke up sad and now it won't go away," I say, a tear rolling down my cheek. Dad catches it with his thumb.

"It's okay, you will get better," he tells me.

"No, I won't. She told me I won't," I tell him.

"Who is she? Your mother?"

"Mum yes but also her," I say, tapping my head.

"Voices, huh?" He says, pulling me into a hug.

"Uh huh, voices."

-

"Earth to Lana," Jason says, tapping me on the shoulder to knock me out of the trance I was in.

"Sorry," I say, shaking my head and looking at him, his eyes now locked to the road ahead of him.

"So, how was the appointment?" He asks me.

"He says he's happy with how my mood has evened out," I tell him.

"That's good, what else?"

"He says he thinks college is putting a lot of stress on me, and has told me to take some time off, and do my work at home," I tell him.

"Oh okay, did he give you a note to give in?" He asks me.

"Yes, I've got to drop it off whenever tomorrow."

"I'll do the same thing then," he says and surprises me.

"What? Why on Earth?"

"I'm not letting you sit at home all day everyday alone am I?" He says and smiles, turning the corner onto my street.

"But you're doing so well Jason, you got accepted early for a reason," he looks shocked.

"And so did you, Lana. We're still going to learn everything we need to. And we are going to sit all of our exams," he says and I shrug it off.

"Okay," Jason pulls over at the side of the road, unlocking the car and climbing out. I climb out too and he takes my hand as we walk into the lobby and into the elevator.

"I'm going straight to bed, I'm tired as fuck," I say as we walk into my- our apartment. I need to get used to that.

"A nap would be wonderful right about now," he smiles and follows my lead into the bedroom.

"Set an alarm for seven, otherwise we won't sleep tonight," I say, kicking my shoes off.