BorderZ

5

"Tell me how you feel about it?"

"The fact that my parents got divorced?"

"Yes."
"The only thing that bothered me about it, is the fact that they made such huge decisions without telling us or taking our feelings into consideration. It's not the divorce that bothered me, it's what came after it, I guess."

"What came after?"
"The big change. Everything was thrown on us, you know. One day your parents tell you they're getting divorced, the next you're all moving out and you're forced to choose one parent. I feel they could've given us more time to get used to it or at least enough time for us to understand what exactly is going on."

"I understand." I nod as I look deeply into the eyes of my client. "have you talked to your parents about it?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I don't think they would understand or care really?"

"Don't you think that's where you're getting stuck?" the client furrows their brow. "You parents didn't talk to you about this big decision, they probably thought that you wouldn't understand or care. Communication is very essential. Ignoring it or not talking about your problems or feelings can be very damaging to not only your relationship but you as a person."

"You're right I guess. But I think it's very selfish to keep quiet about a decision that impacts so many people. Especially people who you claim to love and care about." it feels as though I received a punch to my stomach. Maybe I'm doing what this kid's parents did.

"You should remember that your parents wouldn't intentionally hurt you. They still love you very much. Maybe they're happier apart and that's a good thing, don't you think?"

"Yeah." I smile at him.

"Now I want you to go talk to your parents. Tell them how all of this made you feel and let them explain. Listen and try to understand what they are going through. This is probably just as hard for them." He nods.

I look down at my watch and I see that our time is over. I wrap up the session and the client leaves my office. I let out a sigh before rubbing my face. I move to my desk and take a seat. I can't help but to think about what my client said. He did have a point. It makes me feel guilty.

But I think it's very selfish to keep quiet about a decision that impacts so many people.

I know I should be telling everyone. Especially Zayn and Cate. I can't though. How do you tell people, something you don't even know? I still can't decide between my career or the life I have here. A part of me knows I'll probably choose my career. This opportunity only comes once in a life time and for to get it at such an early stage in my career, is almost unbelievable. On the other hand, will it all mean anything if I let go of the first man I've ever loved? I lock up with the promise of telling everyone my decision at the end of the week. It's looming and I's putting me in an uncomfortable position.

I lock up and make my way to my brand-new car. It never ceases to make me smile. I'm so proud of myself. I breathe in the car smell before driving to the apartment. Everything feels so timeless right now. I'm consciously appreciating everything more, like I don't have much time left. In a few weeks, I may not be here anymore. I may be hundreds of miles away. Away from everything and everyone I've grown so close to. I push those thoughts to the back of my head and I enter the apartment.

"Honey I'm home." I say as I lock the door behind me.

"Hey babe. How was work?"

"Long and exhausting. It's actually super exhausting having to listen to other people's problems on a constant basis." I sit down on the sofa and I sigh. "how was it for you?"