BorderZ

9.

It's been a while since I've played this game.

His eyes will be brown today.

I think for once, do I want his eyes to remain closed longer because I'm afraid the second he opens them, reality will come crashing down.

I stare at his face, as I do most of the time. Once again he looks so peaceful. His arm is loosely around my waist. It feels like home. I don't know for how long I've been staring before he moves. His pulls me in closer. He opens his eyes slowly. We're so close I can almost feel his lashes brushing up against my cheek. His eyes open and I was right. His eyes are brown. He looks at me through heavy eyelids. He blinks. Then again. it feels as though I should stop breathing. For no rational reason. Maybe because I don't want to ruin anything. We look into one another's eyes.

"I told you never to stare." his lips lift a little on the side. I smile a little at him as I shrug. All small movement. "Still too shy to talk to me in the morning?" I nod and he takes a deep breath.

His eyes move all over my face. It seems as though he is searching for something.

"Morning" I whisper.

"Morning." He says just as soft.

"Did you sleep okay?" he nods but I know he's lying. I felt him tossing and turning so much last night. I know that he's very bothered. I was struggling to sleep as well but once he held me tight, I almost fell asleep instantly.

I move to climb of the bed, but I feel his hand tightening on me. he quickly lets go though. I go to his bathroom to brush my teeth and rinse my face. Zayn enters the bathroom while I'm brushing my teeth. I look at him from the mirror as he closes the door. He starts the shower. He lets the water run as he starts brushing his teeth as well. It's all very intimate, but so distant at the same time. We finish about at the same time. Zayn starts undressing and he enters the shower. I stand there for a while. Just looking at the glass doors as they gather steam. I cannot help but feel the ridge between us. I look at him and nothing convinces me that he's still entirely mine.

I do not like this feeling. I need him so much at this moment.

Almost absentmindedly, I start to undress. I step into the shower and Zayn quickly turns around. He looks almost shocked but his face soon returns to normal. He turns around again and his back is to me.

"Melony, what are you doing?"

"Taking a shower." I shrug but he doesn't look at me.

'Mel, not now."

"I know Zayn." We have never come to this point of intimacy. We have never seen each other in this state of undress. it's a first and I think we're unsure on how to handle this, especially with our current relationship status.

I walk up to him and I wrap my arms around his chest from behind. We both relax. I can feel it. Maybe because in this small confined space, we feel safe. We feel as though nothing can influence us. nothing can hurt us. Maybe it's because were close like this, with the just the two of us.

He unwraps my hands from his chest and he turns around. He looks even more beautiful with water running down his body. He looks at my face, running his eyes on every surface of my skin. He moves closer as he drops my hands. All too slow, he holds my face in his hands. He kisses me. The hurt that I've been through, disappears in that moment. I am where I want to be.

We kiss slowly and passionately. I cannot hold it in. I kiss him back harder. He turns me around and he pushes me against the tiled wall. Its coldness makes me gasp. The water is running over both our bodies. We kiss again.