Kadance

25

"Gee Auntie you sure know how to make things fun!" Jax says when they meet up the next day. "Things haven't been this hopping since never."

"Yeah, our final exams were cancelled. They said that life experience means more than any test. We'll all pass if we survive." Jade says just as excitedly as his brother. Kadance turns a bit green.

"Hey, are you alright Kadance?" Jax asks in concern, "Kelan, Kadance needs some help. She doesn't look too good."

Kelan comes over and scolds the boys. "She doesn't need to hear your excitement over the upcoming fight. Besides I believe Tommy just left for the class you're signed up for."

The boys look at their watches and then at each other and in unison they say, "We're late, gotta go Auntie, Kelan," then they race out the door.

"Kelan, I'm not feeling too good, I'm going to lie down for awhile." Kadance says not looking at anyone and turns towards her room and doesn't look back.

Kelan watches her leave with a frown of worry on her head and turns to Jayse, "You'd better go talk to her, she's completely shut me out. Get her to let it out. She needs to release some of her emotions soon, they're starting to take her down."

Jayse sighs as he lets out a breath of frustration. He'd been watching Kadance as well and didn't like how she reacted. "I'll try but she hardly looks at me or Tommy anymore. She's shut us all out."

Borden gives the now closed door to Kadance's room a thoughtful look. Even as Kelan continues. "Then get her to fight, argue with her," Kelan is out of patience, "She's got to pull out of this funk."

Jayse starts towards Kadance's room when Borden pulls him aside and whispers in his ear. Jayse looks at him hard but Borden only nods and Jayse sighs accepting Borden's counsel as he heads into Kadance's room.

"Okay, Kadance just what is going on?" Jayse asks reasonably as he goes to Kadance's side. "You've shut me out, you've shut Tommy out and now you've shut Kelan out. What's going on, have we offended you in some way? Talk to me please?"

Kadance refuses to look at Jayse just like she refused to look at Kelan and replies, "Just leave me alone Jayse. I don't feel good right now and just want to rest." Which is something that Jayse usually has to force her to do, but it's said in such a sad toneless voice that Jayse can't leave her alone.

"Not until you talk to me Kadance," Jayse replies flatly. Something's wrong terribly wrong and he doesn't like it. "Why won't you talk to me or Tommy?"

"I just can't right now," Is all that Kadance will say.

Borden's advice now seems good and he employs it, "You think we're monsters and that our society is sick and depraved. You are sick because you're carrying the children of sick and disgusting monsters. That's how you see us, isn't it Kadance?" Jayse demands feeling a little sick himself about saying these things and thinking that, that might actually be how she sees them.

Jayse takes out all emotion from his voice to hide the hurt and pain he's feeling right then, "We're all monsters to you and you found your nephews to be just like us as well, monsters all."

Jayse continues his verbal onslaught, hiding the tears he feels at his words, "You hate us for what we are, for what our children are. I have an answer for you." Jayse takes out a tablet and breaks it in half. "A full tablet would kill you, it's what we give for the final grace, but a half would just make you violently ill and abort the fetuses. Then you could dissolve our bond and the bond with Tommy and renounce your membership to the warrior society. You'd be free to return to civilian life." He holds out the tablet to Kadance praying to whatever deity that might be listening that she won't take the out offered to her.

Kadance looks at Jayse then. She gets up off the bed and walks over to him. He holds the tablet out to her and she ignores it. Instead she slaps him so hard his head whips to the side. And he's relieved.

"How dare you!" Kadance says in a voice loud enough to be heard in the other room. All activity ceases as they unashamedly listen. They had heard the slap as well and they wince in sympathy for the pain he's feeling. Borden goes to make an ice pack for when Jayse comes out.

"How dare you suggest that? I would never abort any child of mine. I don't find you, or Tommy, or any of the others monsters, I never have and it would take a lot to get me to change my mind. The monsters are coming to attack us and have been for years. No, I don't see you as monsters, I'm just having a hard time. I'm trying desperately to not say stupid civilian things. You, Tommy and the others are who you are, who you were born to be and I don't want to interfere with that in any way. But at the same time I don't want you to fight. I've already nearly lost Tommy, so I sure don't want him to fight again and I sure as hell don't want to see my nephews fight.

"To me all I see are my loved ones all excited about the fight being some game, a game that I don't have any excitement to even see let alone have all my loved ones participate in it. I'm sorry but that's how I feel, to you it brings you alive but to me it terrifies the hell out of me. I don't want to take away any of your concentration as you prepare for this and what needs to be done. You live for this all of you and I understand that." Kadance is now crying, "You're made for this but I'm not."

Jayse pulls her into his arms, "You are like us in so many ways that sometimes we forget that you weren't born one of us. Sometimes, it's better to tell us things than hold back like you've been doing. Tommy, Kelan and myself we're not mind readers and all we can see is you pulling away from us. For Tommy and me, that hurts us more than anything else."

Once the voices lower the activity in the other room picks up and the tension level has noticeably dropped as things are brought back to an even keel.

"I'm sorry Kadance. I'm sorry." Jayse says holding to her tightly. And he kisses away some of her tears.