Toxic [Richard Kruspe]

Why am I here?

  A cold shiver runs down my spine as I hear his words. This can't be happening. I'm standing with a half-open mouth and there's literally nothing that can stop the flood of tears on my cheeks. Richard caresses my left cheek with his palm. Like he said, it's too damn hard to process that he wants to keep me captive forever. The dream I created in my mind about him and meeting him under the best conditions, right now is crashing like a Jenga tower.

  - "Please don't cry. I can't handle easily the crybabies.", he whispers, while he's cleaning my face of the tears.

  - "Why are you doing this? What could I have possibly done to you? You.. you don't even know me.", I cry, sadness covering my facial futures.

  - "You'll find that out eventually. I suppose you are a smart girl, aren't you?"

  - "I'm not smart, obviously. Otherwise, I wouldn't have fallen for you at the first place."

  I hear myself saying these words and I earn a smirk from Richard, who's looking pretty satisfied with my reply. He comes closer to me and I hit the back of my head on the wall, trying to avoid any contact. But his eyes looking deeply into mine, don't make it an easy task to be honest.

  - "You've fallen for me? Well.. that's one interesting plot twist right here.", he lifts his eyebrow with surprise.

  - "Platonically, to be exact. Huge emphasis on 'platonically'.", I add. "I fell for your music and that's it. I would never fall for a sadistic kidnapper." My heart beats fast, knowing that I'm lying.

  - "DON'T!..", he shouts on my face, "..you ever speak with that tone to me again, am I clear?", he lowers his voice. His gaze looks threatening.

  - "Okay."

  - "I SAID, AM I CLEAR?". His shout scares me and all I can do is nod. "Perfect. Time for you to spend some quality time alone."

  - "No, you can't just leave me here!", I protest.

  - "Oh, I'm sorry, did I hurt your feelings?  That's funny, because, um, yeah, it's the other way around.", he mocks me ironically and stands up, walking to the door.

  - "Richard!" I snap and he stays still, his back facing me. "Are your bandmates aware of this madness?"

  He slowly turns his face to me and smirks, sighing. I have a strong feeling that darkness has surrounded his thoughts, maybe even a little guilt.

  - "You bet your ass they know, Anna. Sweet dreams.", he finishes, closing the door behind him.

  - "Richard please! Don't!", I shout but it's pointless.

  I'm not sure what to do at this exact moment, but I need to stay calm. I lie down the mattress and I close my eyes. Progress report: there is no progress at all. My (ex?) favourite band member kidnapped me out of nowhere. I have no clue why he keeps me as a hostage, and plus, I offended him, because I stated that I'm not in love with him, a sadistic kidnapper. In what sane world does this surreal situation make even the slightest sense? He doesn't know me at all, like, literally, and he acts like a spoiled brat. I'm not going to give this more thought. I'm tired. Sleep overwhelms me and pauses my anxiety.