Toxic [Richard Kruspe]

Busted

Paul agrees to Christian's order and with a quick step he goes down to the rehearsal room. Me and Christian take the elevator and I follow him to his room. It's as beautiful and cozy as mine, every furniture and painting in the same pattern. I sit on the bed leaving down my crutches and as soon as he places his suitcases behind the door, he joins me in the bed, crossing his legs. An awkward silence is hovering in the air, until I decide to break it. I support my broken arm with my free one.

- "So... how's life Flake?", I try breaking the ice, avoiding to look him in the eyes.

- "Simple. You know... Tour, keyboard, music, travelling and stuff.", he answers awkwardly.

- "Good, good. Uhm, should we get into the point now? You look nervous."

- "Yes, yes, you're right. Look, Anna, we are not that close yet, like with the rest of guys, but I feel the need to tell you something and you have to promise that you'll remain calm.", he begins, taking a serious face and I get serious as well. I gulp.

- "Your tone is scaring me, Christian. Whatever it is, I can handle it. Tell me."

- "Okay... Uhm... Here's the thing... Richard is coming to the mansion tonight. And before you jump into conclusions, nobody knew it, it all happened really fast."

My heart is beating like crazy, hearing Richard's name. I try keeping a straight, emotionless face.

- "Richard's coming? And how do you know it?"

- "He called me a couple of minutes ago. He didn't let the other guys know that he's coming, because he's mad at them for not inviting him. Plus, he's not aware that you're here. That's why I'm warning you. He escaped from Till. I don't know any more details."

Christian finishes and I take a deep breath, blinking nervously.

- "So be it. If he wants to be with his friends, that will happen. I have no say in this case. I'll just politely ignore him. Simple as that."

- "Yeah, about that..."

- "What now."

- "He's crazy for you Anna."

It's so damn hard to hide my smile but I manage a cold stare successfully. I bite my bottom lip.

- "That's not my problem.", I lie. 

- "Isn't it, really? Because depending on what I already know, you had a huge crush on him since day 1."

- "I had a crush on him because of his place in Rammstein. Like, my favourite band member. This... this is completely platonic."

Christian stands up and exhales in a way that shows me that he's not convinced and satisfied with my answer at all.

- "Even though we haven't talked much in general, it's pretty clear from the sound of your voice that you're telling me lies. No offence."

I stand up clearly annoyed and I grab my crutches, heading to the door.

- "Okay, you wanna know the truth? I liked him. I felt something deep for him and he disappointed me in the worst way possible. My friend's in a coma for God knows how long and I'm nearly disabled. I don't know about you, but it's hard for me to accept that the man I had this high in appreciation, failed me. Now, does it sound like the truth to you Christian?", I frown feeling the sadness overwhelming me.

- "All I can say is that I understand your side and I fully respect it. Just... don't give him such a hard time. He feels like shit from the guilt. He's my friend and I care about him a lot more than I let to be shown."

- "Fine... fine. I'll try to chill. It's Christmas. These are days of forgiveness.  When he arrives, I'll do my best to make it work.", I sigh.

- "Thanks Anna. I knew you were kind hearted.", he lifts his suitcases and opens them to organise his clothes into the wardrobe.

- "And you're a very good friend. Richard and all the guys are too lucky to have you. Thank you also for the warning. I'll have enough time to prepare myself.", I smile. "I'll go to my bathroom to take a shower. At least I'll try. Warm water will calm me down. Can you inform the guys so that they won't worry?"

- "Sure, no problem.", he waves. "Thank you too.", he winks and I exit his bedroom, with his words running non stop in my mind.

I enter the bathroom and I strip out of my sweater and leggings painfully slow. The pain in my arm is kinda easy to handle but the hard part is my leg. My knee and ankle hurt so bad, but the plaster cast somehow easies the pain. I can't ask anyone to help me shower anyway, so I have to figure out how to do this by myself.

When I finally get completely naked, I check the water temperature and I get under the shower unit. I drag the shower door to close it. The hot water is so relaxing, I almost forget that I'm in pain. My heartbeat is back to normal and I close my eyes, letting the water clean my thoughts and my body. With my free hand, I rub my head and I move my hair to the left shoulder, trying to rub my neck too.

I bend over a little bit to reach the shampoo, until I feel a presence in the bathroom. All of a sudden, I see two arms hugging my waist softly from behind and a body coming closer to mine. A rush of adrenaline overwhelms me and I scream as loud as possible, but the hand closes my mouth and shuts me up before anyone can hear me. I stop fighting, because in my weak position, there's pretty much nothing I can do to escape. I slowly turn around and face the person that caught me of guard and scared the hell out of me. I goggle my eyes when I recognize his sad, yet beautiful eyes looking straight into mine.

It's Richard.