Toxic [Richard Kruspe]

Alex

Till's POV

- "Are you sure you want to come with me? Didn't you have that... uhh... What was it again?"

- "Meeting with our manager. We all did, Till. But this is important.", Paul chuckles from the co-driver's seat, turning on the radio, but I shoo his hand away, keeping my eyes on the road.

- "No need to turn this on. Don't forget that your driver is a singer.", I wink.

- "So, you'll just sing off stage? You never do that, except for the concerts or the studio practice! Till...", he says in a foxy tone. "Is there something I should know?"

I gaze awkwardly out of the car window, not sure what to answer. In fact, it's not easy and definitely not appropriate to confess my secret crush on my friend's girl. It's wrong in so many ways to feel like this, but on the other hand, it's hard to keep it hidden. Damn. If I don't answer anything, Paul will get suspicious. Not that he's not already, depending on my overprotective behaviour against Anna, when Richard wasn't actually rational.

- "It's a good day, Landers. Alex is awake and Anna will finally have a reason to smile. Why shouldn't I be happy too?", I try my best to sound convincing.

- "I'm not saying the opposite, it's just that... it's bizarre. You seem happier with this event than anyone else, even her, maybe." He places his elbow near the car window and rests his head on his palm, sighing.

- "I just want her to be happy. She suffered much and this is a good opportunity to recover from her inner pain."

I corner and wait on the stop sign, till I continue driving again. The roads are so crowded and the traffic jam is getting on my nerves. I rest my head on my hand too and wait for the front cars to go on. Looks like I can't escape Paul's interrogation.

- "Don't forget she has Richard now. He makes her the happiest she could ever be and the same holds for him too. I really hope that it will work for them."

- "Yeah, I hope that too, or else things are about to get pretty ugly.", I clench through my teeth, without realising that I'm doing this and Paul gets the hint. How dumb I am.

- "Uh... Till? Can I ask you a question? And promise that you won't set me on fire on our next gig?", he pops up, half serious, half joking.

- "Sure, whatever."

- "Are you jealous of Richard?"

- "Bist du doof?", I burst. "Jealous of my friend? Wh-why would I ever feel this way?", I tangle my tongue, feeling extremely uncomfortable and exposed.

- "Because he has her, Till. There's no need to hide from me. I saw how concerned and protective you were over her while she was at the hospital and even when Richard broke into my house. We were all worried about her, but you? A little bit overreacted, if you're asking me.", he explains hesitantly, not sure if he wanted to open this conversation.

I close my eyes lowering my head a little, and start driving again. Who am I kidding? He's right. He's so annoyingly right, that I don't know how to put my feelings into words. I stare at the roadway blankly, no emotion in my face.

- "What if I do, after all? It doesn't matter. She chose him from the very beginning and so did he."

- "I won't tell anyone about this, of course. Richard is my best friend, yet he got through so much to get her, that knowing this would kill him. I'll keep my mouth shut." He does a zipper gesture with his fingers and I smirk. "I see why you like her though. She has a spark, spunk and bravery. Not all girls have this qualities.", he points and I roll my eyes.