Be With Me

Chapter 52

James stirred on his sleep and found the bed with too much space. He opened his eyes to find he was alone in there. So, he took his hand to the light on the nightstand and turned it on, sitting on the bed.

"Babe?" He called hoping she'd be in the bathroom but there was no answer.

James pulled the sheet away and got up, peeking on the hallway. She wasn't there either. So, he went to the living room and there, he saw her standing in front of the pool, looking down at the water.

"Fuck..." He whispered seeing her so absent looking down at the pool. James went to her and grabbed her from behind, kissing her neck. "Hey... You abandoned me there." He told her sweetly, to distract her from the thoughts he knew she was having.

"He just had to go where we've always told him not to go..." She said. James pulled away and span her around.

"He was a kid Rafi; he didn't know danger. He didn't understand."

"Do you ever ask yourself what happened?" She asked and James nodded.

"I think the ball fell on the pool and he tried to grab it, and then fell. That is the only thing that makes sense. I don't think he'd jump; he was afraid. Remember how he'd held on our neck when we were there with him." James voice trembled a bit, remembering Liam was so painful.

"We should have been watching him and none of us were..." She let out. So much frustration in her voice, killed him inside. Rafaela was so far from being alright.

"We can't blame ourselves babe. We never wanted anything bad to happen..."

"We weren't watching him James!" She insisted and right there he learned how much she blamed herself for it, maybe as much he did blamed himself.

"Babe..." He sighed. Rafaela held him.

"It's weird to be just the two of us now... I can't help to think he'd love to be here with us."

"I know it's weird sweetie. God... and I miss him so much. What happened to us is horrible... horrible. It hurt when my father left, it hurt a lot when my mother died as well as when Cliff died, Liam..." He stopped talking and shook his head with his lips trembling. "I just don't have words to describe it." He was able to say after.

Rafaela strayed and kissed his lips. "I think I am going back on the pill."

"Why?" He asked her.

"I don't want to have a child now. I know we were trying before this happened, but this happened, and I don't know... I am not ready for a child now. I am afraid... I don't know..."

"I don't think I am ready either." James confessed. "But maybe it would be a good thing."

Rafaela looked away thoughtful. "Jesus... the ground was really pulled off of our feet."

"And we're gonna get up, jerk the dust and go on, right?" He held her from behind again and rested his chin on her shoulder. Rafaela remained silent. "My princess..." He whispered kissing her neck and she giggled.

"It's cute when you call me that." She said turning to face him.

"You're my princess, the one I want to give everything I can." He smiled.

"See? Like I said, cute." She stood on the tip of her toes and kissed his lips.

"How about a dive?" He asked. "It's hot... it's just us in here..."

"James no..." She shook her head, but his hands pulled her nightgown up and she let him pass it through her head.

"Oh..." He bit his lower lip looking down at her panties. "White... it must look really cute when wet." He said not caring about her initial no, he simply grabbed her by her waist and he jumped inside the pool, holding her. When they immerged, they both began to laugh.