Be With Me

Chapter 58

James looked out at the streets and bounced his legs up and down at a frantic speed. His hands resting on his knees and his fingers tangled on each other strongly. He felt his heart racing inside chest, and he gasped a little bit for air. The lump on his throat growing as they approached their destination, the hotel where Rafaela was staying. Kelly had talked to her when she got to the airport, she was in her room waiting for her friend. James feared her reaction when she saw him, but he was willing to take everything from her but refused to let go that easily. Deep inside he knew there was something else. Rafaela's head was a turmoil, lately. Things took tremendous proportions in seconds...

"James..." Kelly called his name yanking him off his trance, and he turned his head to look at her. "Calm down. You're giving me the creeps and leaving me nervous too."

"What if she still doesn't believe me?" He asked. "What if..." He shut up. He shouldn't even form that thought on his head.

"The worst has already happened. She already left the house, she already told you that you're done. What can go wrong? Worse than that?" Kell asked but mentally thinking things couldn't be better than that. Better than this, just Rafaela's head snapping for good. That would be gold!

For a few seconds he searched quickly for words to tell Rafaela that could change her mind. Desperately he found out he had none but the ones he had already told her. James shook his head and rubbed his hands over his jeans, to dry them, they were wet from the cold sweat.

"I love her Kel. I love her so much that the thought of losing her is driving me insane. I don't know what I'll do if I come back on tour without her in my life. I don't want to be a free man; I want to be committed to her. I can't live without her. I don't want to live without her." His words stung strongly on Kelly's heart. She looked away to disguise her fury. How could he have fallen in love with her that way?

"It surprises me that she let go so fast, I am not going to deny that." Kelly poisoned him. "I know she loves you back, but I can't stop thinking about what made her come to this decision. I know she's very tempestuous, very short fuse, very impulsive, but something else must be in her mind." Kelly commented and eyed him by the corner of her eye. His lines were so rigid. James was in panic and she loved that.

"I know..." He breathed low. "I told you her head is a mess. Even if we were alright, there were times where I felt her so distant. It's ok, we're going through a rough time, so I think those distant times is when she remembers our kid. I have some moments like that too."

The taxi stopped and James lightly jumped on his seat looking outside. Kelly patted his leg.

"We're here." She said as in support and he just nodded his head.

"I'm fine." He said.

James paid for the taxi and then they both stayed outside staring at the entrance.

"Aren't you coming?" Kelly asked him as she realized he was not following her when she began to walk. James shoved his hands in the pockets of his faded blue jeans and walked right behind her to the elevator. His gaze always on his feet as the elevator climbed to the 7th floor. His heart began to race again when they reached the hallway where her room should be. Kelly checked the number of the doors.

"7010" She finally said. "This is it." Kelly raised her hand to knock on the door, but James grabbed her wrist.

"Wait." He asked her.

"What for?" Kelly curled an eyebrow. "Do you mind get yourself together. It's Rafi, the woman you have been living with since you were 22. Hello?" The woman you betrayed me with, motherfucker? Kelly thought.