Chapter Forty-one

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I turn my head to stare at the LED alarm clock. 10:49 pm. I can't sleep. I'm scared to even close my eyes, afraid of what I will see. I turn to see my mom sleeping peacefully on the right side of bed. 

I grab my phone, and before I can think it, I text Shawn.

Serenity: You awake?

Shawn: yeah, was working on some stuff
What's up?

Serenity: Can I come over?

Shawn: Of course, suite #25

Serenity: Thank you.

I scribble a note and leave it on the nightstand for my mom and creep out, walking down the hall to Shawn's suite.

I knock lightly and he opens the door, dressed in a t-shirt and sweats. He had light circles under his eyes, not very noticeable but still there. We smiled at each other and he let me in, locking the door.

I turn to him in bed, and he is already facing me. "I can't sleep," I say, as if it wasn't blatantly obvious. "Come here," he says softly, and I scoot closer until I feel his body touching mine, radiating body heat.

"What do you want me to do?" He asks me. "Could you sing to me?" He smiles, "Song choice?" I shrug, "Anything.."

His melodic voice left a sweet sensation ringing in my ears. (Song-Crazy by Shawn Mendes)

You're all I think about when I'm awake
Part of every night and every day
And everything's a mess when you're away
Now I ain't know
All of this is getting really old
I'm having trouble sleeping on my own
Feeling like a house but not a home
I want you to know..

When he holds me in my arms like this, singing to me like I'm the only girl in the world, I feel like we belonged. I feel like I wasn't broken inside, I feel loved by someone who I love.

"You mean so much to me, you don't even know," Shawn tells me, "I don't know how I can live without you."

I smile, my eyes closed, "You mean the world to me Shawn."

There is a comfortable silence until I spoke again. "What are we now?" I snuggle closer, basking in the warmth he provided. 

"Would you..want to be with me? I'm only going to be here for a month..I want to enjoy my time with you," Shawn says hesitantly, as if he's worried I wouldn't agree. I would, in a heartbeat. Anything for him.

"Won't they find out?" I hesitate, not because I didn't want to, but because I was afraid of the consequences.

"They don't have to know.." Everything about this seems perfect. I used my hands as support to lean off of Shawn, hovering over his face with sudden confidence.

"Okay," my voice breathy as I lean in and kiss his soft lips passionately. His large tattooed hands firmly cup my face, and my fingers run through his curly brown hair. He uses his teeth to bite my bottom lip gently, and I let out a moan. My cheeks reddened at the embarrassment from the sound, but Shawn seemed to like it because he kissed me harder.

He leaned in closer, and I tugged on his hair lightly, letting out a groan from his mouth. Slightly aroused, I pulled again and he repeated the same noise. 

Unfortunately we both pulled away, trying to breathe again. In this position, I lay on top of him, my chest heaving up and down. The top of my breasts were shown from the collar of my t-shirt. 

Shawn's eyes were a darker shade of brown now as they shamelessly raked my body from under me, looking up and down at my breasts. He opened my legs, making it so that my legs were on either side of his body. I could feel a slight bulge between my legs. Someone is feeling aroused.

He circled his arms around me, pulled me close of another kiss. Shawn slipped his hands under my shirt and up my lower back. I gasped as the cold metal rings on his fingers made contact with my sensitive skin. 

Our lips parted, pur breathing unsteady. "W-we should stop before we lose control," Shawn says, although conflicted with himself, "I don't want you to think I'm using you for anything." My chest heaves up and down as I try to steady my breath. "Yeah, you're right," I nodded, feeling his chest rise and fall. I reluctantly slide over next to him, my heart still racing.

"Sorry I have no control," he says, laughing nervously. "Neither do I." 

"He's coming," I say, shivering. I don't know how I know, I just do.

"He'll never find us," Shawn informs. I shake my head. He doesn't know him like I do. He will find us.

"I uh..arranged some security for you just in case," Shawn said, smiling sheepishly. "Thank you Shawn, you really didn't have to, though."

I weirdly don't feel tired anymore. I guess the lusty atmosphere woke me up. "Are you tired?" I ask him. He shakes his head. "I want to take you somewhere," I say, getting out of bed and pulling his hand to get up.

I fix my shirt and pull my sweatpants up, "You can wear something from mine, " Shawn offers and I kindly agree. I grab a navy blue "Youth," hoodie and slip it on. 

Shawn really did go all out. Two men with white suits accompanied us-he even got us a personal driver? "Shawn this is too much," I tell him, but he waves it off. "It's not that big of a deal, don't worry about it."

I whisper to the driver the destination and he takes us there. I don't forget to strictly inform the bodyguards not to accompany us. "Where are you taking me?" Shawn asks curiously, "Where did the bodyguards go?" I smile at him, "I want it to be just you and me. As for where I'm taking you, you'll find out soon enough," I winked at him,  and he elbows me playfully.

I tell the driver to stop at an abandoned clearing and told him to wait in the car. "Cmon, lets go," I say grabbing his hand. The weather wasn't cold, it was perfect. I lead him to the end of the clearing, to the edge of the cliff. Underneath us was water.

"Let's jump," I tell him. He stares at me out of bewilderment, "Are you crazy? No way! We could get hurt." Always the logical one. "People jump from here all the time Shawn, I promise it's safe," I say, taking off Shawn's hoodie. 

"Okay, let's do it." I nod, "turn around Shawn," I tell him as I remove my t-shirt, shoes, and sweatpants, feeling slightly insecure, even though he's seen me in my underwear before. "Done," I say, turning around to see Shawn only in his boxers. 

I don't miss the way his eyes wander on my body, eventually settling on my eyes. "You really are unpredictable," he laughs, placing my hand in his.

"3...2...1.." I grasp his hand tightly and we jump at the same time. The rush of adrenaline pumps through my veins and I scream just as the cold water hits us.

We resurface to the water and I smile at his expression. He looked purely happy, his face was glowing, his hair stuck to his face. "That was amazing!!" He exclaimed like a little kid opening up presents. "Yeah, come on," I tell him as I tighten my grip on his hand as we reach the shore. 

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