It's Complicated (Shawn Mendes Fanfic)

Chapter Forty-nine

Shawn P.O.V.

"Hey mom, I missed you," I say, engulfing her in a hug. She smiled sweetly and let me in. "Is dad home?" She shook her head, "No, but Aaliyah is." We engage in conversation.

"How are you mum," I ask her, sitting on the couch while the bodyguards brought the things in. "I'm okay, it's been off without you here, we missed you," she says and I smile at her, a genuine smile. "Me too."

"Hey whats that," my mom exclaims as she moves the collar of my shirt, "oh gosh Shawn, what have been doing the past months to get yourself a fresh hickey?" Wait what? I look down at my neck and I noticed a purplish bruise from the corner of my eye. Goddamn Serenity. I turn red as a tomato, "uh," I try to justify it but nothing comes out.

Oh my god. I've been roaming around with a hickey on my neck, surely the media caught on. I pull out my phone and search my name up on Google and click on the news. "Shawn Mendes spotted with hickey on neck: Who is this mysterious girlfriend?" The headline says it all. As if I already don't have a lot going on. Now the media is going to be after me. 

"I'm going to go see Aaliyah," I tell he, excusing myself and walking upstairs. I knock on her door and she says come in. She looks up from her book and smiles, running up to hug me. "Oh my gosh it's really you!! I missed you so much!" I smile and hug her. "I missed you too sis."

‘Something’s up, you don’t seem like yourself,” Aaliyah comments. I sigh, she always figures out everything. “What do you mean?” I ask her, laying on her bed. “I don't know..you just seem kinda sad for some reason,” she shugs.

“Tell me everything,” she demands. I try to play innocent with hopes that we talk about something else, “About what?” She rolls her eyes, “Well, maybe let’s start with where you got that hickey from.” My cheeks turn red, “uhh you know..” I stall. She smirks, “No, I don’t know, please do tell.” I groan, knowing i’m about to tell her everything.

“Wow..um..wow..So you’ve been busy,” Aaliyah grins and I nod. “I think you should talk to her Shawn,” she insists and I sigh. “It’s better for her this way,” I shake my head. “You know you can’t forget her right?” I nod to my sister, not being able to form words. I could never forget her, even if I wanted to.

“Well i’ll see you in a bit,” I say, needing time to reflect on what my little sister said. She may only be 16, but she is extremely smart and will call me out on my bullshit. That’s what I love about her.

I grab a beer from my fridge and stare at the night sky, taking a big gulp. The bitter taste stings my throat, but it feels good. I know this is a shitty idea and im going to get hungover but I can't help it.

I've always liked alcohol. It gave me a moment to just forget my problems, even for one night. When things got really bad last year, I started smoking weed. My family was so worried for me. I decided that I needed to get my shit together and started releasing music to ease my mind. Then I took a break because if I knew I stayed, I would get worse.

If she was here, she would be disappointed in me. I'm really just a disappointment to everyone. What would she say? She would scold me for drinking so much and would help me go to sleep. 

I usually sleep fine. The past few days my mind wasn't at peace, and I barely got a wink of sleep. Only with her do I feel at peace.

I wake up with a pounding headache, grabbing the pill and popping it in my mouth, too lazy to go get water. I stare at myself in the mirror. I look horrible. I had dark circles under my eyes and my hair was a mop of a mess. I wash my face and brush my teeth.

"Oh Shawn what happened? Have you been drinking again?" My mother asked, worry evident in her gentle voice. I push hair away from my face, "yeah." We stay silent for a while. "Do you want to talk about it?" She asks me. I shrug, "It's not going to make a difference."

****

My phone rings, and I desperately pull it out of my pocket, praying it’s Serenity. Her name flashes on the screen and my heart skips a beat. I answer the phone quickly-I need to hear her voice again or i’m going crazy. I don’t say anything as I listen. “Sh-shawn,” she says, her voice breaking, and I could tell she was crying, “I’m sorry.”

“Shh it’s okay, please don’t cry. I’m really sorry too, I was going to call you,” I admit to her. “Why didn’t you? It’s been hard without you. I didn’t even say goodbye,” she reminisces. I miss you too.

“I- It’s better for you if you don’t get involved with me. You know, because i’m famous,” I say, trying not to show the pain from saying those words. I hear her sniffle, “I know what’s good for me Shawn. And it’s you.”There’s a slight pause on her end before she continues. “I’m willing to endure it all if it means I can be with you.” My breathing hitches. She really means that? I could feel my heart racing and I smile even though she can’t see me.

“Really?” I don’t attempt to hide my surprise, which was evident in my voice. I hear her breathe heavily, “Yes.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t say goodbye before I left,” I say, regretting my actions. “It’s fine. We were both..busy,” she says, for lack of better term. “How is it, back home?” she asks out of pure curiosity. I smile, “It’s great to be back home with my family. But...I can’t stop thinking about you.” I lay on my bed and stare at the ceiling. I could just imagine her blushing because of my words. “Me neither.”

“I told my sister about you. She really wants to meet you now,” I laugh remembering Aaliyah’s grin. “I would love to meet your family, they seem so nice.” I wish she was here with me. “Oh..by the way..everyone noticed the hickey you gave me,” I say smugly, knowing she is probably as red as a tomato right now. “Oh..um..” she says, speechless. I chuckle, “Even the media wrote about it,” I say, trying to embarrass her further.

I walked downstairs and couldn’t stop smiling. She is perfect. “What’s got you grinning like a Cheshire cat?” Aaliyah snickers and I stop to glare at her like the loving brother I am. 

“When you got here you looked really sad honey, what happened?” my mom intervenes. “Did a special someone call?” Aaliyah grins evilly. My mother raised an eyebrow, "Shawn has a special someone?" Oh god.

I sigh, joining them on the couch. "There's this girl, and I've fallen in love with her." There's no simpler way to state it. "Is that why you came here sad? Because you didn't want to leave her?" My mother asks. I run my fingers through my hair, "Yeah. We got into a fight before I left but we fixed things now."

"Do you have a picture?" Aaliyah asks and I pull out my phone, showing them my lockscreen. "Wow she's gorgeous," her and my mother exclaim. I smile, "I know." 

Aaliayh claps her hands, "when can we meet her?" A question I wish I had the answer to.