Battle For Happiness

@28

Allegra POV

I ran to a place where I didn't know. It was in the middle of a forest where I stopped. It was so scary. There was an abandoned house there. I moved to it. I was not shivering despite the fact that it was so cold. Guess it's cause I was a vampire. A new born. I didn't even know how to fight. I didn't even know what powers I had. This was so annoying. It was all because of my ugly past.

I moved to the house and got in. It began raining. I was lonely and it hurt. Yes, I deserved it but being lonely again hurt. Ever since I was young, I was always lonely. My parents always wanted me to do what they wanted to see me do and not what I wanted and because of that, we were never having time together as a family. We always ended up arguing and me running to my room and locking it. Though all that used to happen, I loved them so much. It really hurt when I found them dead. That's when I developed a heart of killing. A heart of fighting for what I wanted but instead it ended up being a stupid heart... I also had Hazel. But she only gave me time when she wanted me to do something for her. She was selfish but still caring when I needed her sometimes though not much. Nevertheless, I loved her too. Her parents were sweet too. They gave me a shoulder when my parents were being assholes. But they were also busy so I was never much with them. I loved them anyway. I saw them at Raven's party looking at me speaking to Raven and feeling pity for me just like they had always done. They also kinda had disgust and anger in their eyes. It was because they might have thought I ran away and did a plastic surgery just to hide my dirty acts. I was feeling bad. I didn't even have true friends from school. I was always alone... until when I met Jacob Blake Xerxes. He was always there. He was a brother. He trusted me. He took me as his sister. I had got lucky. He introduced me to his friends, his family in other words and all I gave him in return is betray them and leave them wounded just cause I was selfish. I was so stupid...then life gave me another chance to be happy and not lonely only for me to find out they wanted to use me but they didn't care about me. My past was also trying to destroy my present....

Now here I was, in a lonely and abandoned house in a middle of a forest I didn't even know about with a heavy down pour from the skies. I only had a phone and my bag.

It looked to have been a bar...or diner. I sat next to the counter trying to act normal and waiting for the rain to stop. I was going to use my phone to know where I could run to. All I knew I wasn't far from Carsy and the rest and if they even cared, they would get me.

I looked at my phone and looked through my contacts wondering who could be helpful. I landed on Michael's contact. Would he really help? I just wanted to get away from Raven for some time. I didn't want her to reveal my identity so soon...thank God they all thought I ran away cause of Carsy.... little did they know.... I was running away from the Lycan Alpha and Luna as well. Blake surely wanted to kill me with his own hands and a chance had come his way... I was fine with dying anyway. I wouldn't have to suffer with the guilt from my past... or try to fight my love for Jace... Rodney....reason why I got so heartless. Reason why I killed all those guys. Reason to my craziness. Reason to my current state... I am not blaming him or something... just that he was so hot, cute, handsome, irresistible that I fell for him and ended up making the worst decisions of my life.

Anyway, I dialed Mike's number and called him. He quickly picked it up like he was waiting for my call. It was so weird that I thought twice about really asking for his help. I actually ended the call without saying anything. I even switched off my phone just in case they wanted to use a phone call to track me down. I was now helpless. This was so stupid. Why was I running away? I had to face my past and reflect on it for a better future. I had to go back... I...no. It would be stupid...

But better...

A voice at the back of my mind finished my sentence. I felt so bad because it was right. If I told the truth and just faced whatever punishment came my way from those guys, my life would at least get better. I wouldn't be hiding. I would just be hated by the world and awaiting the day it's all too much that I commit suicide. No one would care anyway.