Aha what's poppin guys 🤠✋
We got some angst for you to uh enjoy?
Before we get to the angsttt I just wanna quickly reccomond a story!
It's a SomeThingElseYT x OC story by totem665
Im honestly loving it so so much. The quality of the writing is 11/10, the story is 11/10 and I'm anticipating every update. I strongly recommend it. Please do check it out :)
James’ lips trail from my collarbone up to my face before he gives me a longer kiss. He’s seated on my lap, legs wrapped around my waist and hands held at the back of my head. No matter how badly I want to kiss back I can’t.
I bring my hands from his waist to his chest and push him back gently.
His lips fold into a small pout. “What’s wrong?” I gulp, not wanting to say what I’m about to say. But I know what I need to do.
“I… We shouldn’t keep doing this.” James blinks in confusion, his arms that were around my neck moving to take my hands in his. “Why not?”
“You know why. You have a girlfriend… And you said it yourself! You don’t even think you like guys.”
James breaks our eye contact and sighs. “I don’t think I can do this when I know you love someone else.” His nose scrunches up a bit. “Why not? It’s just kissing. It doesn’t even mean anything. It’s fine.” “No, but… What if Sara found out?”
“We hide it,” James says, leaning forward and kissing along my jaw. I hesitate before speaking up again.
“James, please,” I push him back again. “I don’t understand the problem, Adam.” “You love someone else! That’s the problem. We can’t do this when you love Sara.” I frown, crossing my arms.
“That doesn’t matter! Of course, I love her but that doesn’t mean this can’t happen!” James raises his voice. “What do you mean?? You love her so you need to be loyal to her!” “Why is this such a big deal to you anyway??”
I open my mouth to respond but I can’t say anything.
“Go on. Why does this matter so much?” “I just…” “You just what?” James’ expression is looking more irritated by the second.
“See. There’s no reaso-“ “It’s because I’m in love with you!” I blurt out. James flinches at my sudden outburst. “I can’t do this because you love Sara and it’s not good for me to hook up with someone I’m so hopelessly in love with! I can’t. I just can’t.”
After saying everything I take a deep breath, dreading James’ response.
James slowly moves his hands away from my mine. I look away from him as he stands up off my lap. “I’m gonna… go…” James mutters.
I don’t bother looking up, feeling too ashamed to even watch him leave.
Once I hear the door close I look up.
He’s gone.
I screwed everything up.
I know it was for the best but now I don’t even know that we can stay friends. He knows I’m in love with him and he just left because of it. I freaked him out.
It was obvious I didn’t have a chance with James. I shouldn’t have ever done this. I knew I’d just end up getting hurt.
A single tear falls down my face. That was enough to start thousands more.
I spend the next hour curled up on my couch, sobbing. Heather by Conan Gray playing on repeat acting like salt in a wound.
I would’ve spent longer soaking in my despair, but I got a call from my friend Christian.
“Hey, bud. You haven’t answered my messages all day. Is everything alright?” I gulp and breathe in, but it just sounds like multiple sharp and shaky inhales.
“Oh jeez. That’s the ‘I’ve just been sobbing for hours’ breath, isn’t it?” “Y-yeah…” I mutter, wiping the tears from my face. “Should I come over there?” He asks. “That’d be- that'd be nice.” “Okay, give me a few minutes and I’ll be there.” I nod, not able to catch my breath well enough to respond. “Hang in there, dude.”
He hangs up, leaving me to try and calm myself down.
-
As soon as I start explaining what happened to Christian I can’t control my tears. I’d managed to stop crying for the ten minutes I was sitting and waiting for him to arrive but now it feels like I’m reliving it.
Christian rubs my back as I tell him the story, shaking his head once I’m done. “Man. I’m so so sorry. That sucks ass.” I nod.
The way he describes it is a very simplified version of what I’m feeling right now.
If I were to describe what I’m feeling I’d say that it feels like being stabbed in the chest 50 times but not being able to blame anyone but myself because I saw it coming a mile away.
“Listen, I’m always here. It’s okay. It’s gonna be tough, I know, but you’re tough. You’ll get through this,” Christian says. He smiles softly, still rubbing my back.
“Thanks, man. I just… It really hurts.” Christian nods. “I feel like… God, I don’t even know. How can I even describe this? I really loved him. Like, so much. I wanted to be by his side forever. Grow old together and shit. All that mushy gushy romantic stuff. Heck, I still want that! But he… I…” A small sob is forced out of my throat, interrupting me. It quickly turns into uncontrollable hiccups as I start balling my eyes out all over again.
“Hey, come here.” Christian opens his arms. I quickly accept his offer, hugging him tightly and letting my tears fall onto his shoulder. He brushes his fingers through my hair, clearly trying desperately to calm me down.
After the longest hug I’ve ever experienced, I pull back and wipe my tears away. “I’m sorry…” I sniff, feeling my nose running. “It’s alright. I don’t want you to go through this alone. Heartbreaks are hard.” I nod and stare at my feet.
I sigh and bury my face in my hands, “Fuck love, man.”
*cough* 🧍
So anyway, check out that story!! It's really incredible go go goooo go do ittt!! >:D
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jadam oneshots :')
Fanfictiondisclaimer: im not trying to force these two into a relationship. i recognise that they are friends and that's it. if either of these two dont like fan content surrounding this ship that's understandable and ill absolutely stop. i just figure this f...
