first kiss

168 5 28
                                    

*screams*

I take a deep breath and turn to Adam.

"Adam?"

He hums, keeping his eyes glued to his Nintendo Switch as he frantically mashes the buttons. A multitude of explosions and zaps echo from the small speaker.

"I wanna kiss you."

Adam's attention is immediately drawn from his switch to my face. A voice bellows 'Game over,' which Adam doesn't seem to care for anymore. A deep pink grows on his cheeks.

"What?"

I look down at my shirt and fiddle with the fabric. I shrug and look back up sheepishly.

"Seriously?" He asks, letting his switch drop to the floor.

I don't blame him for being surprised. We've been dating for 5 months now. And about halfway through he attempted to kiss me a couple times but I've never felt ready. I'm scared. I mean, it's my first kiss. I need to be sure right? And it needs to special I'd think?

"I-If you just feel pressured by me, please don't. You- you don't have to kiss me just cause I want to. It's up to you," Adam rambles.

I shake my head and join him on the living room floor.

"No, I... I think I'm ready."

Adam scans me as if his eyes are some kind of lie detector.

"You... think?"

"Well... I mean, I... I'm scared."

Adam turns to face me and grabs my hands in his, "If you're scared we don't have to. We can take this at your pace. Whatever you want."

I nod and grip his hands tightly. He squeezes mine in return.

"Okay," I say.

"Okay," Adam repeats.

The mood becomes tense as Adam looks at me expectantly, waiting for a further response. I stare at our hands trying to decide whether I really wanna do this now. If I really wanna throw my first kiss— my very first kiss —away. Right now.

I look up at Adam. He smiles at me.

That was all he had to do.

I nod and smile back.

Adam's calm and encouraging smile suddenly fades as he starts panicking.

"Wait is that— Is that a yes?? Are you— Can I—"

I smile and nod again which prompts a squeal and his happy hands (when he gets excited he tends to shake his hands around like the happiness is just bursting out of him. It's adorable).

"Okay! Uhm— Alright! So, uhm— Yeah, I'll—" He stops and shakes his head. "No, no, no. This has to be perfect."

He jumps up and grabs my hand, dragging me all the way to his bedroom.

"Is this fine? Can we— Is this okay?" He asks nervously.

I nod and he grins again, turning off the overhead light and turning on some fairy lights. He leads me to his bed and sits down cross-legged.

"Is this good?"

I nod and join him on the bed. The fairy lights give the room a gorgeous dim glow that almost calms my nerves. It could very well be a scene from movie if Adam's room didn't have so much mess all over the floor. He's not the best at tidying, what, with all the dirty dishes, clothes and paper around the place.

"Okay... Okay! Good! So you're comfortable? Do you want, like, a pillow? Or... uhm... anything?"

I laugh and shake my head, "I think I'm alright."

Adam lets out a sharp sigh of relief and smiles at me.

"Alright! So uhm... You're... ready? And absolutely certain?"

I nod again.

"Absolutely certain," I say.

"Okay," Adam nods and reaches his hand up to the side of my face, tucking a small piece of hair behind my ear. "You just tell me if you want me to stop or... if I do something wrong or... anything. Okay?"

"Got it," I reply, desperately trying to keep my voice from shaking.

Adam leans forward, watching my eyes the whole time. As if he hadn't made sure I'm okay enough it seems he's still being extra, extra safe.

I watch what he's doing, tilting his head to the side, and copy him. He smiles and his eyes flutter shut. I do the same but can only keep them closed for a brief moment being afraid I'll do something wrong.

I watch Adam get closer and closer until his lips gently brush against mine. I follow his lead and lean towards him. His thumb strokes my cheek and I feel the most safe I've ever felt. I close my eyes, feeling confident that Adam is looking after me and that I'll be okay.

Adam pushes the slightest bit of extra pressure onto my lips before sliding his hand off my face and pulling away.

I open my eyes to see Adam staring back at me with a shy smile.

"Was that okay?"

I nod with wide eyes, having no idea how to put the experience into words.

"Adam... I... You..."

Adam fiddles with his fingers as he waits for me to finish my sentence.

"Thank you," I whisper.

He giggles. "You're welcome?"

"I... feel like I didn't do it right..."

Adam shakes his head.

"You did perfect. And those 5 seconds were the best 5 seconds of my entire life. Even if it was a little awkward," Adam grins, his entire face glowing red.

I smile and lean forward, kissing his cheek.

"You're the best, Adam."

"O-oh... I don't know about that. I ju-"

Before Adam can finish and pull him into a tight hug.

He's been so patient with me and has gone out of his way to make sure I'm as comfortable as possible and for that I owe him the world. Who needs the moment to be special when the person is the most special?

Adam hugs back just as tightly.

It's fair to say I have the best boyfriend in the world. 

we stan patient and supportive partners :')

jadam oneshots :')Where stories live. Discover now