Heisen's Eye

Chapter 76

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Airi's POV
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Ryu still lays in front of me, breathing much easier than he did not 20 minutes ago.

I've just been sitting beside him, my hand over his, thinking.

How does a kid, just two years younger than me, go through so much that he can say things like that? So that he can shake as much as he did?

It just makes the difference in our lives that much more apparent.

I certainly wasn't raised without discomfort. Being a woman while training as a Knight isn't easy by any means.

But it wasn't so bad to make me cry out, beg for someone or to someone.

Yet, even if it did manage to get to that point, I likely wouldn't be in the same position.

Ryu is... Alone. Probably always has been.

I've had the Captain to raise me, Astrid as a friend, Kana as an older sister, Etsu as an older brother. But Ryu probably hasn't had these people.

He has probably had to look out for his sister at all times, even when he was in the forest.

Even now, while he's asleep, he still calls her name, ever so softly.

I can't even do anything about it.

I can't say I understand because I can't.

I can't help because he doesn't say anything.

And any action I can think of will probably only raise the walls he's made around his heart even further.

It hurts. There's no way it couldn't.

"You're too kind." (Captain)

A deep voice calls out from behind me, accompanied by heavy footsteps and the slight clink of metal.

"I can't help it." (Airi)

"For a Knight, you need compassion, but too much... Too much may hinder you." (Captain)

"I know. I know, but... I can't help it." (Airi)

"Of course, that's how I wanted to raise you. That's how your parents would have wanted you to be." (Captain)

"Really?" (Airi)

"Well, they certainly wouldn't be happy that you already have blood on your hands, but that's something they likely came to terms with when they left you with me." (Captain)

He does this often, talk about my parents. He probably does it to remind me that he's not related to me.

"... How did they die?" (Airi)

"They were kil--" (Captain)

"'--led by bandits'. I know that. But how? You said my father was a man who fought alongside you in the war. How did he die by bandits?" (Airi)

"Because fighting beasts and fighting humans are different. Your father was too kind. He was different to me. He was raised well and not too sheltered. He understood people's emotions. I wasn't raised well. I struggled on the streets. I didn't care for other's emotions. That's how we differed." (Captain)

"... Then, does Ryu remind you of yourself?" (Airi)

"... No. He has someone he wishes to protect. I only had myself." (Captain)

"But you're going to disregard that feeling that he has. You're going to go to Greif, aren't you?" (Airi)

"Not me. We all are. Like I said, I didn't care for other's emotions." (Captain)