Heisen's Eye

Chapter 89

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Ryu's POV
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Walking down the streets of Greif, I could almost see visages of me and Akari racing down them, laughing all the way.

I hope she can still smile like she used to. Everyone in the village complimented her smile whenever they could.

Though we didn't stay in Greif for long, Akari certainly made her mark on the people while she was here.

That was one of the reasons why I told her to go to Old Man Frien when everything happened with the No-Names.

Maybe I hurt her more by sending her here. I knew Old Man Frien was ill, but I didn't expect him to die so soon.

I wonder why I'm even sitting in front of his grave right now.

Do I feel grief? Do I feel gratitude? Should I say thank you? Should I start crying from loss?

I don't know. I really don't know.

My emotions seemed to be fighting in a whirlwind in my head right now, fighting for supremacy.

But I didn't seem to feel anything. Maybe everything I'm currently feeling all amounts to nothing. Maybe I'm not even human, not feeling anything after the loss of someone close.

I don't know. I probably don't want to know.

Though the things I said to Captain were out of spite, only hoping to appease him, maybe they had some truth.

"Ryu?" (???)

From behind me, a voice called me, deep yet somewhat calming.

"... Zion." (Ryu)

"Come on. Don't call me that. Don't be so distant." (Zion Frien)

"... What do you want?" (Ryu)

"Haah, well, I've not told Akari you're here. She'll find out though, don't underestimate her." (Zion Frien)

"Right..." (Ryu)

"... She's doing fine. Even after Dad's death, she picked herself up quickly. Do y'know why?" (Zion Frien)

"... I... I don't..." (Ryu)

"She didn't want you to see her in such a sorry state. She didn't know when you were gonna come back, so she made sure you'd be proud of her when you did." (Zion Frien)

His words seemed to dismantle something in my chest, as if he was opening a path somewhere inside me.

"You did well, Ryu. I don't know what happened 3 years ago. She never told me. But she never let it hold her back. She's still living everyday as best she can. And y'know what? Those letters you sent? They're the only times I see her cry. Whether that be from joy or otherwise." (Zion Frien)

The more he speaks, the less control I feel I have over my emotions. As I listened, I didn't even realise that tears were pooling in my eyes.

"I--I don't know... What am I supposed to feel? I'm so confused... I don't feel anything... Even as I sit by the grave, I feel nothing... What should I feel?" (Ryu)

"I don't know, Ryu. That's something for you to figure out. You're you, and I'm me. I can't tell you how to feel. I can't tell you how to act. I can only help." (Zion Frien)