Stay (BTS x Reader-Polyamorous romance)

Chapter 10

Jungkook POV:

"Just something with Y/N but Jin and I are taking care of it.  Don't worry about it."  Those words rung in my ears the next morning no matter what I did to push them away.  It hurt that Hoseok wouldn't tell me what was going on with my human mate, but at the same time, I couldn't blame him.  Instead of Y/N showing me that I wasn't worthy of her, I showed her that she wasn't worthy of me.  With a sigh of frustration, I dressed in a pair of sweats and a simple black t-shirt, my standard "uniform" for the gym I worked in. 

Grabbing my small duffel bag, I set it on the floor by the front door before going to grab a bottle of water and a protein bar, something Y/N had started buying for me when I began the job at the gym.  She told me that since I was working out so much, I needed to make sure I was eating.  Y/N was sitting at the island in the kitchen, a cup of coffee in front of her and Jin sitting next to her, holding her hand gently.  He looked up when I came in and gave me a small smile before turning his attention back to her, but Y/N didn't even acknowledge me.  "Hey.  Hobi will be here with you during the day.  If you need me at all, send me a message and I will come home."  Jin showed her his phone before shoving it into the pocket of his scrubs.  "It's going to be okay.  I promise.  I love you."  Standing up, Jin kissed her cheek before giving me another small smile.

As he headed towards the door, I stopped him with a hand to his shoulder.  "What happened?"  I couldn't stop the worry that flowed through me for my mate.  I may have been trying to push her away, but it didn't mean I stopped caring about her in the least.  I was still so much in love with her, but I knew it was something I had to try and push down. 

"Lost a hybrid last night."  Jin's voice was tired and I could see he was carrying the weight of Y/N's pain on his shoulders.

My heart broke for my mate and I knew my shock showed in my face.  "Is she alright?  Do you need me to do anything?  Do... do you want me to take the day off and stay with her?"  Even if I was trying to push her away, my concern for her overtook everything else. 

Jin shook his head.  "No.  Hobi and I are taking care of her.  Don't worry about her." 

Jin's words were polite, but it was clear what he was saying – You don't want her so she is no longer your concern.  I wanted to shout out that he was wrong, that I wanted her, that I loved her, but I couldn't.  I couldn't do it because I knew if I let my guard down at all, it would let her back in and I was terrified to do that.  Terrified to have her and lose her.  I nodded, my heart hurting at his words and not liking the feeling at all.  In fact, I fucking hated it. 

Jin hugged me goodbye, giving me a quick kiss and I went back into the kitchen, wanting to check on Y/N, give her the affection I know she would need, but Hoseok was already there with her.  He was sitting in the chair next to her, his bushy tail tickling under her chin, making her smile.  Seeing the closeness between the two, seeing the way she was so easily able to respond to the fox, I couldn't stop the feelings of envy that hit me, leaving a bitter taste in my mouth, like the dark chocolate Jin liked to eat or the black coffee that Sehun drank.  It used to be me that would soothe her when she lost a patient, but Jin made it perfectly clear that it was no longer my responsibility.

"Um... I guess I'm going to head to work."  Hoseok looked over at my words and stood, coming over to me.  He hugged me quickly and I was surprised but remembered what he said last night about just wanting all of his mates together.  That desire of wanting to be together eliminated the need to be polite and hold back.  I returned the hug, loving his easy affection, it reminding me of Y/N and how she used to be the same way. 

I looked over at Y/N but she said nothing, her eyes staring blankly into her cup.  At this point, I don't even know if she heard me and was ignoring me or if she was just so lost in her thoughts, in her grief that she didn't notice me at all.  Either way, it fucking hurt and I didn't know how to make it better.  I knew I had screwed things up with her and as much as I wanted to run to her, pull her into my arms and tell her how much I loved her, I just said a quiet goodbye to Hoseok and left the apartment.