Deja Vu - parkjisung

ch.19

dejavu.

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status: very unedited

There was a moment, where nothing moved. Nothing, not even the wind of the night breezed phased the pair. Aeri felt her whole body malfunction. Her heart froze and her knees locked in place— everything that he had just enveloped her with— the butterflies, the fuzziness, the fast beat of her heart it all silenced. It was as if he flicked off a switch.

"Loved?" Jisung might have misheard and misunderstood entirely, but for a split second— he swore with his whole being, he saw a look of disappointment flash in her eyes. He wasn't the best at reading people, he left it to Aeri to do that, however in that moment— his fingers underlined and stroked the delicate pages of her book, flicking through the numerous papers of words to close off this chapter. And he himself, thought for once, he could comprehend such a difficult beauty as Han Aeri.

Even the way she spoke the five character word, with the confusion lacing her thick tone, it did things to Jisung that he would have thought to stop after they broke up numerous months ago.

And with every sentence exchanged, every answer, every question, their relationship kept getting more complicated than it should be.

"I don't know, but you get what I mean," He muttered, because genuinely he didn't know what willpower had controlled him to speak an honest truth or what could have been an exaggerated lie.

I don't know. It was always I don't know with him. Did he not want her so much to know that it was her he need? Or did he not want to admit it? Or simply? he just did not know?

It would explain the uncertainty in his dark abyss like orbs.

But, Aeri wouldn't let him off that easily. There has been countless "I don't knows" and no forward straight answers. She knew her worth, she knew she deserved something. Something that wasn't abstract and made her think til she couldn't feel her head, something that would be spilled from his tongue and instantly she would understand.

There was that burning in her chest again as she parted her chapped lips.

Instinctively, his eyes flickered down warily before unnoticeably returning his gaze to her level. The least he could do was listen, she had been listening to him all night, speaking what she believed to be was bullshit.

"No I don't, Jisung. Explain it to me, you can't just say something like that. I don't know can't always be a crutch for you," She urged, coming off a bit harsher than what she had intended. Aeri didn't like pushing people, not one bit— being a victim of a few situations before— however she couldn't help herself.