Taron and Me Book Two

Shoelaces

"Shoelaces are tasty but only in my dreams." Said the man, shrouded in a black tablecloth to disguise himself.
"Sorry sir that password is incorrect you can't come in." The bodyguard glanced at the man.
"Well it was five minutes ago."
"Well it isn't now." The bodyguard mimicked his accent.
"I really wasn't in the mood for this today."
"For what." The bodyguard smirked before seeing the dagger appear from beneath the man's cloth.
"That's right, squeal piggy." He let out a giggle as he said this. A sinister giggle.
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Taron sighed, he had been like a grumpy squirrel since Tyrone made his escape. We still didn't know who it was that saved him for sure, but we suspected a man in a very sexy coat that billows attractively when he runs.
That's right, we thought it was his brother, Brother Tetley, from the St. Ben Dover monastery in Ohio. The real Ohio.

"Has anyone heard from Brother Tetley recently?" I stroked Taron's back like he really was a sad squirrel.
"No I've tried to call him but there's no reply."
"Maybe that's a good thing."
"There are no good things in this situation." A voice in a matter of fact tone came from behind us. I rolled my eyes, what was it with people and dramatically entering my conversations? We turned to see Brandon, his scarf tied around his neck and his coat blowing in the breeze behind him. Perhaps someone should tell him it is the middle of July.

"It's you again." Taron's face lit up and he went in for a handshake. Brandon looked down at his hand like it was diseased before eventually taking it in a very brief handshake.
"Yes good deduction skills." His voice sounded sarky.
"Mollie this man is a genius, he saved me from them aliens." Aliens? I knew I had zoned out when he was telling me what he happened to him, but surly I would have remembered something like that?
"I already know him." I said cooly. I had a sneaking feeling about this guy.
"I suppose you know why I'm here already."
"Have you found Tyrone?" Taron looked eager.
"Who?" Brandon looked genuinely confused.
"Wh-what do you mean who? You said you would solve the murder, find out who really did it." Taron was seething with rage. He really was just pure sex walking when he was like this. I felt positively hot under the collar, although it was the middle of July.
"Oh yes, the weird little green man, no I'm not here about him, I've got something even better." Brandon's eyes lit up.
"Better? What's wrong with you." Taron was squaring up to him now, I would have stopped him if it wasn't so appealing to my eyes.
"Nightclub, all of them dead, police are saying it's the grim reaper, absolute gold dust."
"Really?" Taron had stepped back now.
"Yes, and that's not even the best bit."
"Don't tell me." Taron sighed. "You're gonna call it a murder on the dance floor in your next blog."
"It's not my blog. And no, they found tea bags scattered all over the floor, theirs a trail leading right back to that rusty little trailer over there."
"What!" I exclaimed.

We ran over to Tyrone's tea shack and there they were, tangerine infused teabags all over the sand. Tyrone's homemade specialty.
It was then that Rosie walked up to us. Obviously she was lost without the guidance of the senior extra's coordinator.
"Have you seen this?" She looked upset. I stretched out my hand to take a sheet of paper from her but it was snatched before I could take it, by Brandon. Such an irritating little man boy.
"Ah yes, clever, very clever." Brandon was getting even more excited.
"What's so clever about that?" Rosie raised her eyebrows.
"It's obvious isn't it?"
"Not to me it isn't." Taron sounded agitated.
"That's doesn't come as a surprise." Brandon snarled.
"FOR GODS SAKE DON'T YOU ALL HA-" Katelyn's megaphone cut off halfway through her speech. She kept hitting it aggressively to no avail.
"Do you need some new batteries?" Matthew asked politely.
"No, go and find your bloody mule."
Matthew walked up to Katelyn and murmured sharply. "Firstly, she is not a mule, she is a first class stallion. Secondly, her name is Mrs Darcy!"
Then Matthew walked away.
"Sorry, what were you saying about that bit of paper?" I asked Brandon.
He thrust the paper in my direction before starting to pace around.

The paper was a wanted poster. There was a picture of Tyrone on the front looking like an angry sort of tortoise. It read out in bold letters: TYRONE TETLY, WANTED SERIAL KILLER ON THE LOOSE! ANY INFORMATION MUST BE REPORTED TO DI GREG LESTRADE.

"Damn" I thought to myself. "This Greg Lestrade dude sounds mighty fine." I then shook the thought out of my head as I saw Taron looking troubled. He needed my unwavering sympathy.
"So why is it clever then?" Asked Katelyn looking at her watch.
Brandon sighed. "Think about it, Tyler has a vicious fight with Uhtred, then storms off. No alibi. Then he winds up dead. Then he's wanted by the police for murder. All they have to do is sprinkle a few teabags around and there you have it, he's on the run for several murders."
"So whoever did it is quite literally getting away with murder." I felt proud of my contribution.
"How do you know it isn't Tyrone behind all these murders?" Richard was lurking in the background. He was such a Krogstad.
"That Bafoon couldn't even make a nice cup of tea, do you really think he's capable of murder?" Brandon scoffed. "That's far too obvious."

Taron looked upset so I decided I would go and make him a cup of tea. I walked into the trailer and opened one of the cupboards at my eye-line.
"Now don't be alarmed lassie." Tyrone whispered urgently.
I screeched before clamping a hand over my mouth.
"Tyrone! What are you doing in the cupboard." I whispered aswell.
"What does it look like I am doing ya wee ninnie?"
"Shouldn't you be on the run? Who was in that helicopter? Where did they take you? "It wasn't the same person that killed all those people in that nightclub was it?"
"Slow down ya wee tinker! I can't tell you where I've been, it would be too dangerous for a wee English hooligan like you." Tyrone sighed.
"What do you mean too dangerous?"
"It's complicated, but all ya need to know is I'm innocent. I'm just a law abiding businessman with a flare for tea and all it's exoticness. Tequila?" He held a half empty bottle towards me.
"No thanks."
"Suit ya self, more for my wee Scottish stomach, not that it's really small." Tyrone laughed at himself. I had a feeling he was a bit squiffy.
"What will you do?" I was sad for him.
"I need you to fetch something for me."

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"Who's there?" Called Joe Mazello. Cardboard Ben was tucked under his arm.
Footsteps approached, Joe was feeling nervous.
"It's me."
"Who?" Joe was confused.
"Death." The voice was followed by a figure in a black tablecloth. They were carrying something large covered by a white sheet. Death put the heavy object down and took the sheet off.
Joe tried to run but Death had stepped on cardboard Ben, dragging him out of Joe's grasp.
"NO, give him back!!" Joe felt panic surge as Ben was dangled over a mysterious box . Suddenly it turned on.
"Come on Benny boy, time to go for a swim. Whoops, I mean a shred." The figure laughed as they dangled Ben into a paper shredder. He slowly disappeared, as Joe watched on in horror.
"How could y-" Joe could not finish his sentence as Death had planted a bullet into his forehead.

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Alone in the makeup trailer, Katelyn wiped blood from a knife......

"Stupid fake blood." She muttered. "Goes all sticky and gets stuck to the props!"

Elsewhere, Rosie sharpened a real knife.