𝐀𝐎𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐒/𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐒

Regrets | Hange x Reader

Prompt- Readers dad died from cancer a few months ago and goes to Hange after breaking down

Hange uses she/her pronouns in this one

Life had a way of balancing out. It always repaid what it owed and never let one thing get too out of hand. But now, things seemed as if there was no way to possibly fix what had happened. Nothing in the world could ever make up for what was taken from you. And you were right. No amount of anything could ever fix the past. Your life had changed drastically and the universe seem to glance over you without a second thought. Time didn't stop for you and rain didn't float back up to the sky. Everything stayed the same except for you.

Hange shrugged off your week's absence, not wanting to pry into your life and demand an answer. Instead, she let you be, not interfering and only mentioning the absence when she welcomed you back from your leave. She came to regret not asking at least a little a few months later.

Hange worked late in the lab, everyone going home a few hours earlier while she continued to work happily. When she finally finished she didn't bother tidying up, instead of leaving the mess to the janitors and grabbing her coat and leaving. The walk home was dark and peaceful; she sigh as she neared home. She had been looking at her feet as she slowly walked but glanced up quickly when she heard a sniffle. There you sat outside her door. Hange rushed forward, any tiredness was now gone from her body as she quickly approached you.

"Y/n?!" Y/n what happened?" Hange audibly gasped when your red strained eyes met hers. "Y/n?" she asked softly.

"At least you weren't ignoring me?" you dryly laughed before starting to cry again.

"What? No, I worked late. Why are you here? Why are you crying?" She asked quickly as she unlocked the door to her home and ushered you in.

"I- Uhm..." You wiped your nose with your sleeve. "I'm sorry I shouldn't have-"

"No. Stay. Tell me what's wrong." Hange said, holding both sides of your arms to keep you from leaving.

"I-It's a long story and you worked late. I really shouldn't be bothering you with this." you tried to move towards the door only to be held in place.

"You're not bothering me with anything. Now tell me what's wrong." Immediately you started crying again, Hange grew concerned but didn't have time to question it before you began to talk.

"I-It's my dad. A few months ago he died and that's why I took time off but... but I just can't seem to move on. Every day I regret not spending more time with him or not being there more for him when he needed me. I should've been there. He was in so much pain! I should been there more! I should've told him how I love him more often. I should've been a better daughter. I should've done more. I should've been better. I should've done so many things but I didn't and now I'll never get the chance to." Hange pulled you into her, softly stroking the back of your head.

"Shh. It's okay." Hange let you sob into her shoulder, cooing and comforting you.

When you finally pulled away Hange sternly looked at you. "You listen to me Y/n, and you listen good, your dad loves you. You were perfect to him. He loved you so much and he understands that you're human. Look, we always have something to regret. We always have something we wished we had done differently. But sometimes, the best thing to do is learn and move on. Your dad doesn't resent you for not spending more time with him and I promise that all he wants is to see you grow. He is so proud of you and you were perfect to him, okay? It's okay to have regrets but you also have to learn to let them go. Let your regrets go. The pain isn't going to magically go away but realizing that the past is the past is sometimes the best medicine. Your dad is always gonna be by your side, even if you can't see him. He is always rooting for you."

"But-"

"No. He knows that you love him. I promise he understands. He isn't mad at you. He looks bed you Y/n."

"But what if-"

"No 'but's. You know I'm right." you started to cry again, leaning on Hange.

"It's okay to be sad and it's okay to grieve. You lost someone very close to you. Someone you love. That pain doesn't ever truly go away. But I promise, with time, it will get easier. You're so strong Y/n and I know your dad sees that."

You fell asleep in Hange's arms that night, quietly talking to them about your dad and reminiscing over memories. She contently listened the whole time and when you finally fell asleep she turned off your work alarm in the morning before also falling asleep.

a/n- for anyone going through something like this - I am so very sorry.

how are you doing?

this was a request by: levihandaughter

I love you more than you know