let me down slowly - wilbur soot

epilogue - two worlds apart

tw // depression, mentions of manipulation

five months later

i tap my pencil against my desk several times. 

stupid writer's block.

last minute, i decided to write a new song for pebble brain. writing helps me forget about my multitude of emotions, and god knows that's exactly what i had needed. i had finished writing it, but now i'm just making revisions.

at first, i was just writing this song because why not? i didn't like it much and wasn't planning on putting it on the record. but of course tommy convinced me to. 

"you have to! it's like... vulnerable or whatever. plus it's so good, you have to release it! or i'll release it myself!" he texted me on night when i sent him a rough draft of the song.

i sit and read the lyrics over again. the ones i haven't crossed out, at least.

it's 3:45 (am)

and i just bite my tongue

update me on your life

and now you've found the one

but i don't like his eyes

and i distrust their name

and i hate their haircut, they look like a prick (a prick)

but it's all the same

will it be daft of me to cry?

your tongue is razor sharp

i miss when it would fight mine

left your heart on standby

by the way he holds you

bet he serenades you

i can't really blame you

and i can still smell her perfume

did it rub off on you?

then a bunch of crossed out lines. but after the disarray of crossed out lines, there's another stanza.

it seems like all our friends

abruptly fell in love

and she was in the dust

darling, life was streaming past

so she learned to lie

she learned how to pretend

a drama in the futile means to an end

why can't you be a dick?

why must you be so nice?

it's hard for me to move on when i don't really hate you

and, finally, the very last stanza.

it's 3:45

your taxi's not arrived

and i don't think that he's coming

i sure wish that was the case.

i sigh as i think back to months ago when i watched her wave down that stupid taxi, get in, and-

i suddenly get up from my desk, getting a head rush while doing so. i need to do something else before thinking about my ex-girlfriend drives me insane. or at least, more insane.