always & forever

22 | „why?"

TW : S€XUAL ASSAULT ⚠️

eventually jamal got bored and went back to the bar to drink even more . i guess i'll have to play mom later . jude just sat there and i could tell that something was on his mind .

„jude are you okay?"

„yeah , just thinking about what happened last year"

last year .

i sighed and he looked like he wanted to say something . we never talked about „us" , well there has never really been an official „us" , but we were both clearly inlove back then .

„can i ask you a question?"

i spoke up after a minute of silence .

„of course"

„why?"

one simple word was enough for him to understand what i was talking about .

now he was the one sighing .

„honestly? i don't even know myself . what i do know is that i liked you . very very much . i'd even use the word love . it was just so ... easy and perfect to be with you and the way we knew each other back then was everything for me . you were everything to me . then , i played truth or dare with my friends and they asked me if i wanted to have children in the future , but in my future i could only see you . you and me .  well because of that accident with your assault i thought you'd be so traumatized that you don't ever want children which was ... unacceptable for me . i'm sorry this sounds rude  , but kids are just .... all i want in the future you know? and i didn't even ask you and just thought about it more and more so i believed it . i thought if i could get you out of my head everything would've worked out you know? i'm so sorry that i never told you what happened or what was going on with me back these days . i know there is no way to apologize for my actions and it's okay if you hate me now"

woah . i sat there a few minutes , taking everything in . then i heard him sniffling which caused me to look over and see some tears rolling down his eyes . shifting over , i wrapped my arms around him and he leaned his head into the crook of my neck . now a few tears also escaped my eyes .  now when i remember what could've been if he had just talked to me and not make his own opinion ... that hurts because i really really did love him . and a little part of me still does because you never really fall out of love with your first love . that's just impossible .

„i forgive you . for everything . but next time , please talk to me okay?"

he just nodded and hugged me tighter .

GAVIS POV

i really felt like i was not supposed to be here . it's like i'm invading her privacy and that just feels wrong . if you didn't already guess , i am at the club where amara went with jude and jamal . at first everything was normal , she danced a bit with jamal , him gladly not being all touchy which i love him for now , then they sat down and talked . i think it was a sensitive or deep topic because they seemed serious . jude was making out with some random girl and came back , sitting next to them , looking sad . they talked for s while until jamal went away . and now i was witnessing a scene which was ... sad?

jude looked lost in his thoughts and after amara asked him something , she also did . them suddenly he spoke . really long . i don't know if i saw it right from here , but it seemed like he was crying . after he finished , they hugged . it was that type of hug where amara was comforting him . then she mumbled something which made him hug her tighter and made me ... mad? jealous? then they released each other and she was wiping her tears away . did he make her cry? i hate him now .

before either of them could see me , i walked away and left the club , deciding to hang out with pedri and ansu .

AMARAS POV

during the whole time , i felt like someone was watching me . it creeped me out and after i cried i decided to go to the bathroom . maybe i'll feel better after .

when i walked in , there was no one which i didn't expect . i thought there'd be couples or random hook ups making out or some girl having drama and crying , but no no one was here . that actually relieved me because i did need some time to take everything and every words in . fixing my smeared mascara and applying more lipgloss somebody walked in . i didn't pay attention to it , until i heard a locking noise . when i turned around , there was a middle aged man , clothed all in black and somehow owning the keys of the womens bathroom .

3rd PERSON POV

they mystery guy walked up to amara and she realized that this was no good . trying to run and just lock herself in one of the cabins , the man had already grabbed her arm , pulling her back .

„let me go"

amara tried to fight him off , but he put a tissue to her mouth that „poisoned" her with some sleeping serum . amara didn't fall asleep , but she kinda went numb , not being able to move , but to feel .

the man held her against the wall , starting to undress her . the worst was , she wasn't able to defend herself .

„please let me go"

she begged , her eyes starting to water .

„and why should i do that?"

he unblocked his belt and amara took her last strength to punch him in the face . that was not her smartest idea she had because it doesn't seem like it really hurt him .

„you little bitch"

now he was mad and smacked her with the belt right on the arm where she had her tattoo . she screamed in pain because the little metal buckle caused a huge cut on her arm .

now she was completely undressed and nearly passed out , when he started to rape her . it hurt . physically and mentally . after what felt like hours for amara he let her go and sloppily put her underwear on her , mumbling something of being „disgusted" by her „fat" body . amara shut it all out . she tried . then the man left the bathroom and walked out , leaving her all alone .

end of chapter 22 🫶🏼

a/n: in honor of this number (22) being judes , i put him in it more than usually because he is my fav person of all time 🫂 .

anyways , just to clear this up , neither gavi or amara will cheat! cheating is not okay . in my opinion , the thing that just happened to amara isn't cheating . if you think so , please leave my page ty

more of judes and amaras past??

if gavi would've stayed .....

i love you all sm

aleyna