always & forever

29 | 30th minute

it was the matchday where barcelona had to face getafe and i was feeling nervous , happy and sad at the same time . i had already planned everything and my flights from barcelona to berlin and from berlin to london were booked . the court where i am going is in berlin so i am going there and fly to london 2 days after that .

i am wearing my barcelona jersey , it doesn't have any number or name on it , just the basic home one . luckily , i sat in the vip section where all the other friends or family from the players sit , together with sira .

„i wish you wouldn't move"

„just come with me at this point"

„yeah.. no . only if ferran transfers to a london club and maybe even then i won't leave my home country like that!"

i just laughed at that and was about to reply , when all the players walked in and everyone stood up , cheering for them .

it was the 30th minute and the score was still 0-0 , but the fans started to chant gavis name because 30 was his number . the fans and the club loves gavi , just as much as he loves barça . i found myself chanting his name too .

it was the 90+3rd minute and i thought it would end being a 0-0 score . i was quite sad because i really wanted to hear the fans cheering again . but then pedri made a solo run , passed the ball to lewandowski who played the perfect double pass back to pedri and then ... GOALLLLL

barcelona was now leading 1-0 and there was only 1 minute left to play . i jumped off my seat , happier for pedri than i was for the goal , when saw him pointing at me and making his celebration afterwards . i know that he knew that it was my last game to watch until i leave and his celebration was dedicated for me .

„awhhh i love yours and pedris friendship"

sira said , seeing pedris and mine interaction . i just smiled to myself at that comment .

„me too"

the game ended and even tho it was just a 1-0 win , i was proud of the boys and the club in general . sira and i were allowed to the changing rooms , where no one really changes for the next 2 hours because they celebrate . i spotted pedri and he came up to me and i threw my arms around him .

„i'm soooo proud of you pedro!"

„thank you"

i ruffled his sweaty hair and was about to leave , when i felt someone's eyes staring at me . i turned around and looked directly into pablos eyes . why him now? i just send him a smile and an appreciative nod , signaling him that i was proud of him and left .

TIMESKIP | the day of amaras departure

„you will come back! and we will facetime! that's the mot important rule okay? and have much fun , not too much tho"

„sira!"

i slapped her arm at the last comment and hugged her for one last time . next one was pedri who already held me a whole presentation about how i should behave in england and which times i should call him every day , he was being very .... precise?

„have lotsss of fun in london , see you sometime right? i love youuu"

„thank you , we will definitely see us soon again and i love you too"

i hugged the last person , xavi . he wished me fun aswell and told me that whenever i feel like coming back , i should just tell him because his house will always be my house and barcelona will forever be a place to feel home for me . i nearly cried to his remarkable speech , but i somehow managed not to .

right now i was on the plane on my way to germany and i got flashbacks from when i first flew here , alone and with firm conviction that i won't like it , won't find any friends and that i'll miss germany . of course i did miss my home sometimes , but not as much as expected which i was quite happy about . i remember when i was on the plane and thought „and if i am being honest , i really want to go back" and here i am , leaving spain behind . leaving pablo behind .

it was fucking 3am when i arrived in germany at the berlin airport and i don't know what my expectations where while booking a flight from 1-3 am . i really don't know . it was nice being able to speak german again , it's much easier than spanish or english . the hotel where i was staying in was better than i'd expected it to be . you never know how the hotels are . i just threw myself on the bed and fell asleep not too long after it . tomorrow would be a long day and i already know that i am not going to like it .

GAVIS POV

joão félix is transferring to chelsea?? why the hell . i mean i am quite happy because that means i don't have to play against him in the next game , but it's kind of strange that amara is moving exactly where he is transferring to . she wouldn't move because of him right? i can't turn off my brain which is overthinking the whole situation . maybe she is moving because of him? did they have something going on back in qatar? when i wasn't around? or was it after? did he transfer because of her? those where just my thoughts and i really don't want to believe a single one of them .

in these last days i noticed something about myself and i think i wasn't the only one . pedri , frenkie , alejandro , all of my friends felt that there was something off with me and i knew what . i sm miserable without amara . my amara . the thought of not being able to see her for the next couple of ... weeks? months? drives me insane . i need to accept that she and i are over , but i just can't . my love is too deep .

end of chapter 29 🫶🏼

i love you so much , feel free to talk to me anytime my love ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

aleyna