always & forever

51 | „i promise you"

AMARAS POV

i still don't know why gavi was like this today , but i decided not to judge so early because after all , a funeral can mess up your head and he's probably hurt . maybe he just let it out on me?

wanting to take time to think , i went to „our place" . sitting down on the soft sand , i kept fidgeting with the bracelet that gavi gifted me . i don't know what , but something about this jewelry was special . maybe because it was a gift from gavi and not from any other person .

i came here to think , but now that i was here , i couldn't think about anything . my mind was empty .

suddenly , i saw someone sitting down next to me from the corner of my eye . i didn't turn around though , i just kept staring at the ocean .

„i'm sorry for being like that today"

it was pablo . only now i realized that it was him and i looked up to him , only to see the gorgeous brown eyes i fell for .

„it's alright , will you tell me why?"

„it's stupid"

„please"

he sighed and told me that he was jealous of pedri because he thought me and him had something more than friendship going on . if only gavi knew why i wasn't alone in bed .

„it was stupid , but after all you can never know what people will do . and you are still grieving and that's completely normal and human , you shouldn't be afraid or ashamed of anything like that"

i looked at him while reading his emotions like an open book .

„you know me so well hermosa . better than anyone ever will"

i slightly blushed and stared at the ocean again .

„don't hide your face from me"

i faced him again and i swear , someday i'll drown in his eyes . we sat there for minutes , only staring at each other . eyes talk more than any words ever will .

„hermosa"

„yes"

„can i ask you something?"

„anything you want"

„why have you flinched this morning when i came near you?"

he didn't forget . he cares .

„long long story . i probably shouldn't tell you , you'd only be guilty for something that isn't your fault"

„tell me how you feel hermosa , don't be afraid or ashamed of anything like that right?"

he quoted me and a slight smile rushed over my face .

„well , if you haven't noticed , everyone has been with their family for these last days and even if it were under those conditions like yours , i mean atleast you had your sister and your parents right? well , i was alone the whole time and even if my parents were terrible , i did have good moments and i still miss how they were before they got abusive and alcoholic . i didn't want to disturb anyone due texting them , thinking i'd only be annoying . that no one texted me only proved my opinion . i have been terrible and honestly i still am because i just ... have no one who completely knows me , understands me and can comfort me in ways i want to be near me . their either in germany or in london . yes , i have pedri , but he just doesn't know me so well like some other persons if you get what i mean . i do trust him , but letting another person in is not as easy as it sounds . so basically i've been getting more and more depressed and less motivated to do anything and yes , i even wondered if anyone would care if i'd be gone . no one checked up on me , how i was , what i've been doing lately and normal stuff like that . nobody cared gavi"

while ranting about everything possible , only leaving out the part where i eventually self harmed myself , i told him more than i told pedri .

„sorry i talk too much"

„no hermosa , i love hearing your voice"

my watery eyes met his and i smiled at him , appreciating this more than anything .

„i'm sorry that you are going's through this right now , but please keep in mind that you can always come to me . for anything . even if you were afraid of a spider in your kitchen . i do not care how little the things might be , if you ever need me , i'll be there . i promise you"

while telling me all of that he cupped my face and brushed my tears away , before doing something that made me feel things only he can make me feel . he kissed my freaking forehead .

the forehead kiss was everything . and it wasn't short aswell . appreciating the moment , i leaned in and he hugged me , pulling me into his chest .

my stomach was exploding because of the butterflies in it . forehead kisses where sometimes more meaningful than a kiss on the lips in my opinion .

„thank you pablo"

i mumbled into his chest and he nodded , not wanting to let go off me .

„are you okay?"

i asked after a while when he still held onto me like i was his only thing to hold on to .

„i miss her"

i knew exactly who he meant with „her" and snuggled closer to him .

„she's at a better place right now and is watching over you from the sky gavs"

then the sunset started and i let go off gavi , wanting to see the sun setting down .

„let's watch the sunset"

„you still love them?"

„i will always love them"

GAVIS POV

we were sitting closely next to each other and our shoulders were touching . then i heard her mumble something to the sky .

„oboje mi jako nedostajete tata i mama"

she looked at the sky , her eyes glossy . i loved when she spoke her native language even if i knew that what she said wasn't happy .

„the sunset is so beautiful"

„it is"

i answered , but my eyes wer glued on her .

end of chapter 51 🫶🏼

i have nothing to say except thank you for every single one checking up on me , i appreciate it so much.

i love you

aleyna