JUMP STREET'S JUNE BRIDE???

CHAPTER 14: OFFERING COMFORT

Tom's view:

None of the guys know this, but I usually go to the office on Saturday and Sunday.  Especially if I am on a case or working a case. I mean to do investigative work or research.  I kind of like it that I'm the only one in the office, I get more done that way. Without the guys wanting to shoot hoops, or all the distractions that come during the week.

I am shocked but very happy when I pull up to the station and I see Sydney's corvette.

When I go in, the lights are off.   I don't see her at first, so I step in to walk to my desk. Thinking maybe she is in the bathroom. I hope I don't scare her.

But then I hear the worst sound. Making me stop in my tracks.  I don't see her, but I hear her.  Not only hear her crying, but the words she just said,

"Hey God I thank you for all my blessings. My dad, my brother, my health, my mom for the 10 years I had her, but if you want to take me, please. I'm sorry but I just wish I could die."

I found her at her desk, her head on it, and just sobbing, crying.   Deep pain shot through my chest. Worst physical pain I've ever felt.  God what do I do? What's wrong? How do I help her? I mean we aren't friends, I honestly think she is just a nice person, and tolerating me because we work together. I don't want to scare her. She thinks she is alone.  I stand there thinking what to do. But I have to do something, I can't stand to hear her cry or beg God to let her die.

I clear my throat. Hoping she will hear.  I said, "Sydney, are you ok"

She lifts her head up and sees me. Then she puts it down again and cries harder.

Oh God, did I do something to hurt her? I mean what could I have done. I haven't even gone out anywhere,

I said, "Sydney" I come to her, and kneel down in front of her.  I said, "Sydney please tell me what is wrong? I want to help you if I can."   I wish I could touch her shoulder, to offer comfort.

She said, "Tommy, I'm sorry. I didn't know anyone was going to be here."  She wiped her eyes.

I said, "um I come to work on Saturday and Sunday, either late afternoon or evening. Um just to get ahead on my cases, or research on the computer."  She nodded.

She said, "I can go if I'm bothering you" Then she burst out into tears.

I said, "no you're fine."  She said, "Sorry I'm a mess."  I wasn't sure if I should touch her, the last time I touched her on accident she hit me. I slowly put my hand out and touch her shoulder. I said, "Sydney I just I'm here for you, if you need anything or to talk"  I was halfway expecting her to hit me or knock my hand off of her.  What I don't expect is what happens next.

Before I know it she is hugging me, and crying on my shoulder.  It feels good to have her in my arms, but not like this. I mean I've dreamed about holding her, hugging her, but I would never want it at the expense of her being hurt and crying.  I freeze. I mean I don't want to upset her, by touching her anywhere. So, I keep my hands down straight.  

She said, "oh my God I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."  She got up to run to the bathroom crying.  I said, "Sydney no you didn't."  She said, "i practically maul you invade your space."  She is crying.

I said, "Sydney I want to hug you." Shit that was not the right thing to say.  I said, "I mean I want to offer you comfort in anyway I can."  

I said, "Sydney I mean I want to stop your crying. I'm here. If you don't mind if I hug you, or touch you, I mean not touch you like that, I mean comfort you. I'm sorry I'm messing this all up. I just don't want you mad at me like that night we met."