JUMP STREET'S JUNE BRIDE???

CHAPTER 53: WEDDING DAY

Sydney's view:

I woke up feeling sick. It's my nerves. I don't like to be in a crowd, let alone have that crowd staring at me, and I had a couple of bad dreams that now leave me even more nervous.  In one of the dreams when it was time for us to say our vows, Rob stood up and objected and told the whole crowd that we weren't really a couple, that we only did it so Tom could get a promotion. My brother then asked Tom if this was true, and when Tom admitted it saying he was sorry my brother punched him hard.

The other dream was before the wedding started Tom came to the room where I was getting changed and said he was sorry but he just couldn't go through with it. That he would tell my dad and Jay and they could make the announcement. He was so sorry.

I took Amari and went downstairs.  Judy had spent the night so did Margaret. Judy came downstairs.

She said, "Sydney you look like you didn't get any sleep."  I said, 'I had two bad dreams. Judy they seemed so real. I don't think this wedding is going to happen."

I didn't know that Margaret was in the kitchen.  She was walking through as I said that. She said, "honey it's normal to be nervous."  I was relieved that I didn't tell Judy about the dreams, I would have blown the whole thing and Tom's mom would have been so hurt.

Margaret wanted me to eat something, but I told her I felt sick, so I just had some toast.

Tom's View:

I feel like shit. I am just glad that I stopped drinking when I did.  With the fact that I already have a head ache and I got no sleep last night. At least I don't have a hangover, although I'm feeling really sick to my stomach. Like sick enough to throw up. My hands are sweaty. 

My mom called first thing this morning, and wanted to know how I was doing. She sounded so excited. I told her I was feeling really nervous, and she told me that was normal. I asked how Sydney was doing, and she said that she hasn't came down stairs yet.

I really can't believe that I'm getting married today. That I'm doing this. I feel bad just thinking about how Sydney's dad has been so good to me, welcoming me to the family, saying I'm like a son to him, what is his is mine. I don't want his money, or his rich lifestyle, but it's just the fact that he's so generous towards me. And Jay treats me like a brother. 

I do love Sydney. More than I thought I could love someone. She is beautiful, sweet, generous, loyal. I will be good to her, but all night her dad's words played in my mind, and then I just keep seeing my dad, and I hate that I feel like I'm letting him down. My dad would be ashamed of me, for making Sydney marry me, so that I could get a promotion. That is wrong. She's too sweet to say no. I never grew up thinking that much about marriage, but Sydney did. To her marriage is everything. It's sacred. To her a wedding is a dream, something that makes her remember her mom. Her dream of getting married in June, being a June bride. I feel like I'm robbing her of something sacred. I am so afraid that she ends up hating me one day, because I stole all of this from her.

I had a bad dream when I did manage to fall asleep. Sydney and I got in a huge fight one night, and she was telling me she wanted a divorce, that she couldn't stand being married to me for one more day. That she had met this guy, and she lost him because she couldn't be with him, because of this stupid fake marriage. It gutted me. I didn't want to let her go. I tried to fight it and I told her how in love I am with her, but she told me that she will never love me like that, never want me like that, I disgust her, she even said I'm almost as bad as Rob.

 I know that my dad, my mom, would be upset with me, if they knew. But I am in love with her. I do want a real marriage with her. I want her to fall in love with me. I wish I knew though how to make that happen. I'm not a romantic. I wish I knew a way that I could make her fall in love with me.