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What am I to you || K.TH [Nanya]

Book: What am I to you || K.TH
Author: AngelMisty032
Reviewer: nanyapixie6
Number of chapters read: 8

Title: The title seems intriguing but I couldn't get the meaning from the description. The story line also didn't explain the title which is quite confusing.

Cover: very creative but seems dull, the grey theme is nice but it would need something a little more prominent or another colour. White and the shade of grey you used are quite similar so it seems like it's just one colour. I feel another colour will help change the game even if its black but a sharp shade. And for the subtitles how about using more intriguing words, like instead of: "He's not what he looks like" use "what he seems is not what he is" or "Anything essential is invisible to the eyes" or "Appearances are often misleading".

Blurb/Description: good definition, summarises the entire story and its purpose. Good work. You stated it was fantasy based but it seems more romance based. What I got from this was that its more of romance and the sub genre is fantasy.
After reading through the story, I could tell the description needed more work. It's fine if you don't want to give much away but it would be nice to add something about the mystery of finding the murderer(just a suggestion).
I feel you can do more with the description cause the plot is really intriguing and the description doesn't do it justice.

Originality/creativity: it was a classic cliche, I wouldn't lie sometimes I was cringed XD. As much as some characters are fantastical, I'll say the story is more of a paranormal/mystery/Romance/fantasy .
But you were creative enough with the cliche throwing in the mystery, bullying and different gangs in the school, I liked that.
I was quite confused on how it was a KTH fanfic because other than using his name there was nothing relating to KTH, but after reading some more chapters, I could tell and also
introducing the rest of BTS was a nice touch.

Grammar/punctuation: Grammar is good but needs a little fancy words instead of basic words. It's cool to use basic words but using something more professional like would help. Eg "I'll call you as soon as I land" could be "I'll call you immediately I arrive". Also the pharses and sentences could be better said, the tenses used and others. Working on the tenses used when describing events and situations will do some good. The way they are used in the story can be quite confusing to the reader.
I'm using this paragraph as an example and I hope this helps "After we were done with our breakfast, my mum told me to go and get my things so that my dad can load them in the car
and get going"
It could be better if it were put as: "When we were done with breakfast, mum asked me to get my things so dad could put them in the trunk and we could be on our way"
Try reducing the use of my when realting to family members (this was later improved as the story went on). The first time it is used is important, you're letting your readers know that the people you are talking about are your parents but using them every time they are mentioned in the story is a little too much.
It sounds like you're writing it the way it sounds in your head which is fun but for professionalism and for the sake of your readers editing it like you're writing a narrative essay would make it better.
I think proofreading will really help to improve.
Your use of Punctuation is good but could be better. You used them well but in some instances they were missing. But overall its quite good. I would say try re- reading through
the chapters.
Description of the events was really good, I could really imagine what was happening!

Plot: The plot is really good, it's like a pack of different genres mixed, I really liked that, I didn't expect the mystery part but I really liked it. It is the kind that wants to make you keep
reading, quite intriguing.

Writing style: It was fun seeing some Korean words every here and there, I really liked that and the fact that you put their meanings next to them is a huge plus. I've watched a few kdramas so I smiled when I noticed the words were used.
I loved the start, the first chapter started sweet and all but ended with an intriguing scene which would make you scroll to the next chapter. You executed your suspense well. The conversation was well written though I wonder why her conversation with detective Felix was written in bold text. If you wrote all conversations like that, it's fine but it's kind of
confusing because the detective is right beside her and not over the phone or anything like that.
For a first story, it was written well, there's still room for improvement and I'm sure you'll improve!
I love the use of images to explain, it really helped to picture the events.

Character development: I would say Y/N had a good character development because of how determined she was to find the murderer.

Overall enjoyment: I wasn't really into it at first but then it became more intriguing with each chapter.
If I were to rate the story, I would give it a solid 5. Keep up the good work!

I REALLY HOPE THIS HELPS :)

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